Jaffeebella (didn't want to hijack DecemberGirl's thread), I was similar to you in past relationships, not that I played the man but I was certainly much more casual. When I finally had a man pursue me and sweep me off my feet and all that other stuff - I had no idea how to handle it! After so many years of acting one way, it was very difficult to know how to react to someone who showed they cared so deeply, and who doted on me the way he did. I was so used to fending for myself even while married, that this was completely foreign. Quite frankly I attracted men that thought my independence was so cool that getting them to help me with anything was like pulling teeth! Just another life lesson....
yellowdaylily, i havnt been in a relationship since my last nightmare of a boyfriend... but i know what i want out of a man... and if i keep doing the mans job ill never find the true man i want... so i have to let the man be the man, and be the woman that god mad me to be... but im so happy you found your mate hon... you and so many others deserve that, and when two people are really meant to be together you come together like a piece of puzzle, it actually fits... even thought there is good and bad with everything in life, the same goes with relationships... but i believe if it is meant to be, it will all work out... but me too, i attract men that want me for whatever i have to offer and not really me... and im learning alot, and i guess in alot of ways ive grown too... i truly believe that... and again i know what i want now and i know i wont settle for anything less...
merry christmas and happy new year hon... jaffeebella
Ah well, I HAD but he chose to back away so.... I am mate-less at the moment, but with a clearer picture of what I want out of life! I thought I knew, but wow, I was really wrong. I thought I would be happier alone because I wasn't capable of giving the love I received. I was wrong, I AM capable. That was something he taught me. That I do deserve to be treated in that manner, and that I can enjoy it and love back. I just didn't understand it when we were together - for many reasons that aren't worth going into here. I still don't know if we were meant to be but in the meantime I am learning a lot about myself and life, what I deserve and what I want. Many wonderful folks here have helped with that!
At the moment I am wondering why my cat is under the blanket and not me! But she's got such a happy look on her face I'll grab another blanket before disturbing her.
Happy holidays to you as well - many hugs and much love,
Dear Jaffeebella and Yellowdaylily,
What you have written here is very helpful to me too. Sometimes knowing that others are having similar experiences and willing to share them and open to our thoughts is very theraputic.
YD....you can write on my thread anytime and actually I was hoping you would
Thinking GOOD thoughts for all of US
DG - well I kind of did then, since you found this! I just didn't want to take away from the original intent.
Now, I am going to think positively that I will still sleep ok despite falling asleep again while watching tv - must be cuz I got my blanket back lol
If you enjoy music, look up the woman who just played the trumpet on David Letterman - amazing!