Confused Gemini seeking wise advice



  • i'm going threw da same thing with my wife right. We been marriage for 6yrs too.Shes a gemini to and she told me she were confused.i don't no what to do right now.i don't even no whats going on.im a pisces. what should i do gemini



  • For the first time gemini I feel hope that you are a real person who has dedicated her self to getting rid of the Aries predator from your life. I so hope you have made that a rule for yourself and hubby.

    I truly hope you do study "astrology" gemini. If you do seek clearly your good and negative points you will learn to control the mind and Body you are living in on earth. Your life is mostly influenced by Gemini attributes.

    Study the influences that have a lot of power over gemini .. then other signs. You can study how to 'get thru ' to Taurus. read and read the sign of Sun in Gemini and what ever your Moon and Rising signs are, Those 3 are the ones having most influence on your Life. A good book will tell you. That will be enough to know for a long time.

    You will then be putting positve energy into the world where there is such pain , negativity and misunderstanding of what is right actions. Positive enegy brings Light to all.. as a very wise Book states [ the Bible]. ... Light comes into the World and Man hated it. They loved Darkness.

    I am really excited for your journey and all you are about to find in your study. I recall when i started my journey to learn how to use this life with real purpose and a "help" to Others.

    I may have seemed "odd" yesterday. But in my mind ,I really wondered if maybe a person was just messing with people who are wanting to be of a "help". I could not understand that you would still be questioning that a break with ARIES must be done with speed and ALL Your heart.. Because MOST were telling you that it had to be done AND quickly and in no uncertain terms..or he would pounce again. Only a couple were telling you that you could take it easy. To follow your choice . etc.

    i wanted to know before i got more involved if there was a real person needing help or a prankster. Pisces considers all and everything to be fair.. but not to be used up, .. cause we do identify so strongly in order to help others. READ about PISCES soon !!

    I wondered if were putting off calling a real Halt to communication with this predator.

    Or worse yet, were you not able or wanting to understand and some thing very bad could happen to you or hubby.

    Flirting and affairs are soo dangerous. I deal with people in your circumstance. I had a dear person who insisted to keep her belief in ... " flirting' being a part of life. Her husband finally had all he could take, caught one of her flirting men and her in bed. He snapped and chocked her to death later that night. He left 2 children to be cared for by an elderly ,ill grandma. He went to prison for Life. She thought that he would always be ok with it. A very hard funeral for me and my family to attend. If only I had said more, tried harder. So, yes i do tell it like it is.. from my experience . Many have had the same.

    I may react strongly to infidelity as well as others do.

    But Gemini and LibraLibra.. everyone has a different Walk to be dealing with.. a different journey in this Earth School. Be more patient Libra.. all care for gemini and want the best for her.. esp MsTo9! I very much feel for her from Libras attack a few days ago.

    You cannot know what type of "style" will work in a persons Life !! Gemini called it a "style" herself. She did not condemn it then.

    MsTo9 is dealing with a Pain referring to infedelity in her life , no doubt! Maybe done to her.

    The best of luck Gemini.. keep the resolve to keep the ARiES at arms length. Have someone with you if you can when in his presense. DO not get caught 'off guard".

    He will be removed from working with you if you pray and "believe "for that to happen. ask for 'that' to happen. GOOD LUCK >



  • To Quick: When I said I am confused, it didn't mean I didn't love my husband any more. In fact, it is because I do love my husband and didn't want to hurt him that I am so confused and felt guilty of what's going on. I am not sure of other Geminis but in my case, I was too curious and so flirted with the guy but all the time, I did know it was not right and I knew I should take action to stop it. Never wanted to hurt anyone but people do make mistakes. That's why I am putting this on line and getting people's advice to support me. I hope your wife is just confused. If so, give her more attention and try to remind her the good old days when you were deep in love with each other.

    To Loyless:

    First of all, I am a true individual and every word I said here means sincerely what's on my mind. I do appreciate your help and time on my case. I think I am able to deal with this now, just pray that husband will never know this. I am so afraid to hurt him. People might think this sound fake or whatever, but at least I know my heart and that is true.

    Thanks everyone.



  • To confused Gemini:I Haven't talk to her in about month.We text one anther back and forth.She doesn't want to talk too me right now.I Miss her and our two kids.I'm scared that i might be not loosing my family.I tried talking to her,But she don't wanted talk too me.I just there isn't anyone else.That have her confused like dis.Cause she's real flirtly to.



  • "Be more patient Libra.. all care for gemini and want the best for her.. esp MsTo9! I very much feel for her from Libras attack a few days ago."

    Loyless, there is no book or philosophy on the planet that says i have to be patient with religious fanaticism. The world has been too patient and there have been too many wars and pscyhos backing their rotten behavior up with fanaticism or hiding behind it. I call it as I see it.

    One thing, you view what I said as an attack but you don't view what she said as an attack on Ms. Gemini. Nor do you view what you said as an attack on Ms. Gemini.

    Interesting.

    Do you only have patience for certain attackers that are religious??? Why is presenting a more logical scientific point of view with an intolerance for the fanatical and asking both you and MST09 to back of off Ms. Gemini considered an attack?

    Did I accuse you of beating children??

    Did I accuse you of sinning??

    Did I accuse you of mental instability???

    Did I accuse you of wanton sexuality???

    Did I call you a string of names???

    No.

    What I did do was accurately point out where you were being unfair to Gemini. Sorry, but I do have impatience when a person seeks legitimate help out of a situation and they get attacked with warnings of sin and unnecessary criticism of personal behavior that is not ideal but certainly not criminal nor sinful.



  • "To confused Gemini:I Haven't talk to her in about month.We text one anther back and forth.She doesn't want to talk too me right now.I Miss her and our two kids.I'm scared that i might be not loosing my family.I tried talking to her,But she don't wanted talk too me.I just there isn't anyone else.That have her confused like dis.Cause she's real flirtly to. "

    I wouldn't worry about the flirty in terms of anything personal other than she is dissatisfied with her relationship. I don't know all the details but can you get to counseling? Start with yourself first and then after about 4 or 5 sessions invite her to join. And tell her you are going to counseling no one with two kids wants to break up a relationship. Since you guys are in the "no talking" mode counseling for yourself is the best you can do and I would let her know after your first to sessions so it isn't a carrot in front of a horse. It is something you are doing for you. And whether she want to work it out or not, you get support the support you need while this crisis is going on.



  • Hey guys, let's keep thing civil here. We are all 'friends' on this site. Loyless seems very passionate in her (or his) views and seems to come across at times a little too direct or blunt. It's probably not the intention, but it can make it seem like you are 'attacking' rather than giving opinion or advice. This makes people more defensive and less likely to here the message that you are trying to convey. But if we respond to a perceived attack with your own 'attack' then we'll completely lose sight of what we originally wanted to talk about. So why don't we say that perhaps some things were misunderstood or taken out of context and start with a fresh perspective. How's that?

    Anyway, I feel Confused has been very open and honest and sincerely needed our opinions and advice. I feel that she has been direct about getting rid of AriesMan, does love her husband and realizes she made an error in judgement, but not one that has yet caused any harm. In the end, this scenerio can perhaps identify potential communication or perception issues and even lead to renewed strength in her marriage. This is good. Humans make mistakes, and it's great when we can learn from them and get past it without 'damage'. She still has to work with AriesMan and still seeks guidance on the best way to proceed. I'm glad we can help her through this. I like helping people. It makes me feel good.



  • Quik,

    I feel for you, man. That's a tough scenerio. Hopefully things aren't beyond repair. Number one, things cannot improve or move forward until you can start discussing and communicating what the 'issues' are. That's going to require both of your willingness to do so. The only advice I can give right now is to try to focus on what's truly important. As much as you do feel hurt, and confused, and even perhaps angry from it, try not to point fingers or lay blame or anything along those lines. What she needs to see from you is a willingness to understand things from her perspective. If she sees that in you, it will probably be a great aid in getting the needed discussions and communications moving. Honestly try to put things in her perspectives, and really try to listen to what she is saying. Identifying an issue is the first step in solving it. Don't focus too much on what you want, or what you perceive as 'fair'. Instead focus entirely on what's truly important in the end. That would probably be repairing the 'distance' that has come into your family and restoring the closeness and love that was once shared. Renewing that love and restoring communications I'd imagine would be most important. Getting back to a happy home. All else is immaterial. Try to keep that in mind.

    I have gone through a very similar situation several years ago. In my situation we never did get back together and talk it through. But I had a very good friend that also went through the same thing a few years ago. After much pain and grief, they did eventually start talking about it and working it through. Now they have a happier and healthier marriage than they've ever had before and just had another beautiful baby boy.

    So there is always hope. But until you start talking and learning how to listen and communicate with one another, and truly start to understand each other there is very little that can be done. That's usually the case anyway.



  • To LibraLibraRising & Loyless,

    Please, yes, as DreamerNorth said, we are all friends on this site.

    I would think it was my fault if you two continuing fighting in words. End of the day, I understand very well why Loyless said things in her way and I so appreciate LibraLibraRising for her defending or understanding of me. End of the day, both of you are offering me advice, just in different style. So, please please stop fighting in words and let us just shake hands together. We are friends. 🙂 Smile......... 🐵



  • To Quik,

    First of all, I am not sure what happened before your loved wife stopped talking to you. I believe there's a reason behind everything.

    It will be 10 years since I started the relationship with my husband and we are going to celebrate our 6th wedding anniversary in August. I, as a gemini, loves variety. I love to bring freshness into our life from time to time. It could be a new dish that I learned to cook. It could be a new travel plan for our holiday. It could be popping onto a bus and going to a place that we've never been when we were initially just going for a walk after dinner. And yes, as Loyless said, I do like to study astrology of geminis and agree that gemini people are restless. And I'd expect my husband to enjoy the ideas that I brought in.

    Do you find some similarities in your wife? Do you know what she likes and what she really wants?

    I believe marrige is a life long project that both parties have to put a lot of effort in, esp. when you have two kids together. My husband and I don't have kids yet, but I already feel sometimes he doesn't know what's on my mind. Even when I talked about what I was thinking, he sometimes misunderstood me and acted rather childish. For that, I explained as immaturity. But this makes me feel very tired, after years of living together. I think this is part of the reason why I was attracted to that Aries man who is 13 years older than me. I thought he is mature, he knew what's on my mind. He spoke the words that I was just about to say. Maybe he is a skillful player, as DreamerNorth said, but to me, when I felt tired in my relationship, he did attract me instantly.

    However, that doesn't mean that my love for my husband is gone. Never! All the time when I "flirted " with Aries man, I was debating inside, accusing myself doing what I had done and I felt very very bad about myself because it was very unfair to my husband, the only man who has ever filled my heart in my life. I tried very hard to convince myself I must not do anything harm to my husband and must stop flirting with Aries man. And so I came to this forum and pleaded for help when I felt I was loosing my strength.

    I hope you would try to find out what really happened between you and your wife. Only when you know where the problem started, could you find out a solution. Maybe you would like to talk a bit more about you and your wife so that I could try to help, from a gemini woman's point of view?



  • Also, geminis are communication people. To me, being spiritually or mentally connected with my husband was the main reason when we got married. Before we got married, we were in 4 years long distance relationship and could only see each other twice a year. But to me, a gemini woman, feeling well connected with my man made me over the moon all the time, no matter where he was. But after we started living together, we talked less and less. I sometimes felt that I didn't know what's on his mind and he doesn't know my mind. That confuses me from time to time whether I REALLY know my man??

    But please do not get me wrong. My taurus husband is a wonderful husband. He looks after me. He cares about me but I just felt after we live together, he might thought that I belong to him now and so doesn't need to spend that much time to TALK. And that is upsetting to me. Does this sound something happened in your life? If so, maybe you could try to find a good opportunity and really start talking to your wife.

    I could feel the hear-breaking pain in you when you wrote your words. And I truly hope that I could offer a little help.

    I have received enormous help from all the loving people in this forum and sincerely hope that there is an opportunity for me to do something helpful as well.

    Best wishes to you all.



  • "I would think it was my fault if you two continuing fighting in words."

    Please do not take responsibility for Loyless' words. For what it's worth I don't consider it fighting. I consider it debate. If someone is going to present a premise that is based in a fallacy like an argumentum ad hominem, ad nauseum, or a plea for emotion and it is unnecessarily directed then I will counter it with logic.

    http://www.infidels.org/library/modern/mathew/logic.html

    Please see above site to find out where I am coming from. N.B. I am not an atheist. But appreciate their point of view.

    "End of the day, I understand very well why Loyless said things in her way"

    My apologies to you and her both because I don't understand her way. I have been guilty of attacking people but it is usually when I am dealing with someone who has hurled insults after insults and acting in anger, I can be biting when I launch insults back. I think I have pointed out fallacies and poked holes in illogical arguments and am willing for someone to point out when I am not doing that. I am not angry and attacking as much as trying to prevent someone from getting damaged because of attacks on their person for misguided behavior that we all can be capable of. I sincerely think her way is counter productive to preventing further hurt for all parties involved and suspect it involves more emotional knee jerk reaction than problem solving.

    "and I so appreciate LibraLibraRising for her defending or understanding of me."

    Thank you for recognizing I was defending you. I think you are vulnerable enough and having said that I think you are a very strong person. I have been vulnerable with no one to defend me whilst being attacked. Although your defense was not what you solicited, you only solicited advice about your situation, I acted based upon what I needed at the moment when I was being assailed a good logical defense and it shouldn't have to cost you money. The only person to defend me with logic was me and lawyer I hired. When the situation got in front of a Judge, the judge sided with logic and therefore sided with me. It was a long road to get to that Judge. And an expensive one at that.

    "End of the day, both of you are offering me advice, just in different style. So, please please stop fighting in words and let us just shake hands together. We are friends."

    I appreciate the sentiment. I would like to make friends but this is a message board which needs to be conducted civilly. Friendships are cultivated over time with honesty, courage, and commitment. I have affection for you and I offer motherly advice because not only do I have two children but I find myself mothering the neighborhood kids. Motherhood is as a sacred part of a woman's soul as is her sexuality. Motherhood empowers us with unconditional love. Perhaps Loyless and I are as two bickering mothers at odds with each other's advice.

    Perhaps I just answered my own objection to your premise...I apologize to Loyless and will keep this post as is so the honesty remains.

    My apologies Loyless.



  • "I have been guilty of attacking people but it is usually when I am dealing with someone who has hurled insults after insults and acting in anger, I can be biting when I launch insults back."

    Another mode of attack is when I protect people I do adopt as my children.

    My apologies further. I attacked with logic.



  • I am very very happy to LIBRALIBRA

    for her 2 posts and that

    that i DID send all my emails TO ME today. i kept trying to explain a post mistake and trying to explain myself to get your love and concern for me and others hurting on the panel as well as gemini, Libra.

    Butt i could not send any because i felt it could cause more riff.. even tho my intention was to help you understand me a little.Sometimes i would say something that could be as a "BARB" . i hope you know what that is. And i just could not send the post when i would read it. I had finally tonight also come to believe your defense was so quick because of pain you have felt. I have been crying for you libralibra .. the past couple of hours. I could not see any posts since about 3 pm.. i was afraid to try and scroll to look .. that i might send the post i was working on.

    Because the other night that post was sent to Gemini by mistake. I was typing a concern:. that someone told me the site was probly teenagers messing around chatting and drawing people into..the siteand converse to laf at them. She said she heard about that.. I was only going to ask ,but i typed a lot of other 'stuff' too so it was long.. I meant to send it to myself as i do a lot that get too long or that someone might 'take wrong". I think I clicked on the submit post

    thinking to send to my 'self' and it went to Gemini and the site instead

    I have been typing all day to explain that again, as i dont think anyone understood , especially you and she did not understand , when i posted the next day. at least i knew you thought i was attacking Gemini. And gemini seemed to think i thought she as a person was fake. I did truly not know if it was a "fake "site run by teens chatting. I have never seen anything like this site.. i thought i was getting info about the sign GEMINI> not a chat place. I am sending too much, so i will stop now, but Libra i do know you have been hurt maybe most of all.

    Thank you for letting your heart rule and posting today.

    Good nite and good rest to all. I have not been able to sleep for 2 nights but I will sleep tonite.

    Thank you all.. we truly are all very caring people in our heart . :0)



  • I reread that last post. I hope it did NOT sound like i thought i was good or better or ANYTHING like that. I see maybe it could be thought of like that. I want to be careful and aware.

    REALLY, Life was sooo gloomy and sad all day long. I get tickled when something that seems so very wrong , changes to come out all right. I really would just hug LibraLibra if i could.

    I believe in God , tho maybe not exactly the same as you might.. when something like this happens it gives me Faith that GOOD or GOD will end up as the winner in the end.

    And that "things" are under control after all.

    It makes me laugh and i tend to talk about how it 'was" and how it is ok now.. how it happened.

    I guess i think .. finally is that what all that wierd stuff and crying was about? it seems i understand it clearly, and i am happy. i actually laugh. i know i am very emotional.

    As Dream North wrote so kindly .. Some can be turned off by it.

    BUT just choose to laugh at me , please.

    I laugh whenever i can.. and wish for you to laugh too.



  • My dear people,

    Now everyday the first thing I do in the morning is to turn on my pc and check the updates here. You are both so lovely people, LibraLibraRising and Loyless.

    "when I protect people I do adopt as my children", this is exactly what I felt when this topic started receiving your kind advice from the beginning, even before the debates were posted. 🙂 My family is far away from me and as Libra understood, this is not a situation that I would wish to let my mum or friends know. I don't have a religion (maybe I should now?) that's why when I came here initially, I felt very very helpless and desperately needed what you then gave me, advice, support, understanding, defending and motherly love. I wish I could just give you a warm hug and cry in you. I did cry when I read your second post and now I am smiles with tears in my eyes. Am getting very sentimental now.

    "I kept trying to explain a post mistake and trying to explain myself to get your love and concern for me and others hurting on the panel as well as gemini, Libra." "I have not been able to sleep for 2 nights but I will sleep tonite."

    Loyless, please give your heart a good rest. As you see now, people are quite understanding. I am not saying that you did anything wrong. I took it as different style, really and I do thank you. Because deep inside, I knew I made a bad mistake and needed something straight and powerful to wake me up. And that's what you have done. You didn't hurt me, so please do not worry. As Libra put it, this laterly turned to be a debate. Everyone was expressing their thoughts and sides in my issue.

    I feel Iike finding a new family here. This family is full of love and care, real people! How lucky I am.

    Warmest hug to you, my family. 🙂



  • Hi Gemini,

    Are you English? And what country are you living in?



  • Hi, Libra, I am not English but am living in England. 🙂



  • " Feed a person a meal and he will be full for a day. Give him SEED and he can be filled for Life".

    I sent you about Aries

    But Taurus would be MORE interesting for you now.

    TAURUS:

    You aren't necessarily like a Bull in a ring with a toreador. You could be more like peace-loving Ferdinand, seeking the gentle meadows filled with flowers, sunshine and natural beauty. It's only your stubbornness that can make you angry enough to charge at someone who is disturbing your peace.

    You Bulls are noted for your determination. You get to where you are going, not because you are exceptionally fast or clever, but because you will not be distracted from your goals. Your need for stability and simplicity can motivate you to create a life for yourself that is quite functional, though it might seem boring to someone else. But you aren't interested in taking unnecessary risks that can put your solid footing in jeopardy.

    Your motto might be "Take care of the senses and everything else will take care of itself." It may be that your attraction to material things is less about the objects themselves than it is about the pleasure they bring to your senses. Comfortable living and working space is important to you, along with nice linens, clothing, food and music. And, as one of the most practical signs, your outlook on life is usually quite sensible. As you plod along in life, getting what you need in order to survive, don't forget to look at the beauty that is beyond the material world of material possessions.

    Element: Earth

    Earth signs are naturally practical. In this lifetime we are bound to Earth. There is no escaping the reality around us. The Earth is about as real as it gets; it can be felt, weighed and it has substance. Accordingly, the earth signs base their life on what is real, not what is imagined. Sensation is valued over thoughts or feelings. Earth signs live with their feet on the ground. Others seek their advice because of their basic sensibility. For earth signs, seeing is believing.

    The earth of Taurus is simple and sensible. It's about getting back to basics. This is about working the earth in a garden or about having the tools that we need in order to build.

    More About Taurus

    Get the big picture. FREE Cosmic Profile

    Gifts for Taurus

    Taurus Buddy icons, screen savers and more

    House: Second

    The Second House symbolizes those things that are of value to us. Personal possessions are within this domain, as is our money. Anything having personal value is associated with the Second House. It also represents those things we value that are not things. When you think about what is most important to you -- your own values -- you are indeed thinking about your Second House.

    Key Planet: Venus

    Venus is the planet of love and desire. She is in charge of romance and beauty. But Venus isn't only about physical love; she's also symbolic of the ideal love. When we see a beautiful painting or other work or art, Venus is present. She is the beauty of a rose as much as she is the attraction we have to someone we love. As the key planet of Taurus, Venus is sensual and simple. We fulfill the senses with beauty and life is good.

    Greatest Strength:

    Your sensible outlook on life

    Possible Weakness:

    Accepting less than you can achieve

    April 2009 Forecast for Taurus

    By Jeff Jawer

    Pleasure Principle

    Intense feelings complicate the first weekend in April as expressive Venus in Aries squares potent Pluto on April 3, one day before the tiny, distant planet turns retrograde. A fierce face-off between go-for-it Mars and no-go Saturn on April 4 ratchets up tension. The slightest alteration in plans can trigger fears out of proportion with the situation. You may be sensing deeper issues about trust, safety and intimacy that are better expressed dramatically than shoved into the closet of denial.

    Continue >



  • Hi, Loyless,

    Thanks a lot! 🙂

    I also followed your advice and check my own astrology. It was quite interesting to see that I am a Leo Rising, Moon in Aries. It was great fun reading a more complete analysis as well.

    Thanks. 🙂


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