Hello everyone ^-^
First let me begin by saying I'm very grateful for the insight given by all the people who replied to my previous threads because, although you may not realize this at first, all that everyone has said has been giving me a nudge in just the right direction. Finally hearing what I need to hear to finally pick myself up and move on with my life away from the grief and angst I'd been feeling for... months!
The Scorpio I had been following around like a lost puppy... she was just as indecisive as I was. Instead of waiting for something to happen, I just told her to let go of me, just tell me that I can never be the one. She finally did, and instead of falling back into chaos again I was... relieved.
Predictably enough, I made another hasty decision shortly after. It wasn't so much in desperation, but it seemed right at the time for me so I did it. The girl I had been with before this Scorpio I'd spoken of in past threads was a romantic interest of mine for... years, actually. We got in a relationship only in May of this year and we broke it off because I had to leave for... cough cough Job Corps... =.=
...only early this month, on the ninth (ironically after the retrograde ended), did I decide to go right back to her and see if she would take me. It wasn't just a feeling of desperation that came over me, because I know exactly what it feels like when you're doing something in desperation, but it... it felt right! For the first time in years I felt sure of it and that I knew exactly what I was doing. Sure, it was wreckless, and I had a chance that I'd just end up being more in pain because I had nowhere to go but I'm sure I'd get over it eventually... but...
...apparently she never wanted me to leave. I kept her as a friend and I told her of my pursuit toward this Scorpio, and all the while that she seemed to be happy for me, she was actually very jealous. She thought she just really liked me, but the fact of the matter is that she really missed what we had together and I did too. Now I'm sitting here thinking, 'Then, what the hell was I doing for eight months? Why is Misery Business by Paramore playing in my head? WHY on EARTH didn't I see the signs earlier?'
It's amazing how it happened, because once I got back with this Aquarius girl she has had no inhibition on her thoughts and feelings for me and I must say it is the most refreshing thing ever (compared to being kept in the dark constantly to the girl I was with before). The way she and I get along so easily, have so much fun together, and just... well there's a lot of things really.
I'm not sure if I really posted this for any other reason but to tell those who had been paying attention to what I wrote before that I'm doing much better than I have before.
Once again, I give my thanks to all that listened to me before and provided their insight.
watergirl18 last edited by
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Yay!!! Happy for you