As hard as it is...Should I just let him go?



  • I truly need opinions and help if willing......

    About a year ago I started dating a man I fell hard for. Such a great connection, but he really wasn’t ready for a true relationship and I broke up with him very abruptly and have yet to get over him. But in the meantime I meet another man and from the beginning of our relationship we agreed neither of us were ready to commit so we were friends (and yes benefits came into the picture).

    It has now been 8 months and we are now having some really rocky times the last few weeks. We ended up developing feelings for each other but still have decided we didn't want to venture into dating. I still would meet other men and make more friends and he would live his life as well. He ended up running into an old flame and now is very confused on who he would like to move forward with. His feelings for me are strong. Mine for him as well, but I still am not confident that a relationship between the two of us can last. I don't want to be selfish and ask him to stay with me when I have other friends I have to think about as well.

    To make matters even more difficult for me, another friends wants to venture into a relationship with me as well. I’ve known him for about 6 months and this would be a long distance relationship. I care for him deeply too. But I just don’t feel that physical connection. But mentally and everything else he is great.

    Then another man came into my life this weekend that is asking for me to date him.

    I know this all sounds like I am just out picking them up all the time, but I don't. I am actually the last person that will talk to someone out of the blue or just flirt with anyone at a bar. It seems that I make friends easily and they seem to very much appreciate me for me.

    I don't want to ruin any friendships and I don't want to have my emotional state in turmoil over all this either.

    I just feel really lost on if I should stay single or try a relationship or still hold out for a connection I so felt with the one I left in the beginning.



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  • Getting emotionally physically and spiritually grounded first is key. Self discovery and introspecting your actions and seeing repeat behaviors and patterns, staying true to self and making inner peace with self. Knowing what you want out of life for your self, your own contrivances and happiness then you resonate that and carry that into your relationships, thus attracting others who carry that energy as well. Then once you have that inner peace and embrace your divine inner light, then you can formulate your true hearts desires and a relationship you can manifest from your true higher self and your knowing of self and what type of relationship balances you and the life you have created.

    Hope that helps 🙂

    Divine light



  • One key Element via the initial post.....Trust in self............................................in order to carry trusting energy so others will trust you....trust yourself.....and you will also attract trusting relationships...Trust in your self and first acceptance...understand the situation.....try not to attach to the person but look at the situation, how did you manifest? Are they repeat? Why, what is my lesons here.....until you see, the cycle get repeated......Its the self inner peace that can break it...so understand your past, acceptance can now be down, thus you are now enlightened:) A large step into self discovery and peace................Stay true to yourself......true to your self and inner awareness...

    peace love prosper:)



  • I thank you for responding!

    Mardepp: We chose to keep things casual due to the fact neither one of us wanted or thought we were ready for a commitment in our lives. We needed to be friends that could lean on each other. I have been single for the last 9 months. All of these men that enter my life, enter as friends. It just so happens that these men learn more about me and tend to ask the question "can we give it a try?". I make men friends just as easily as woman friends, and I am not sure why this magnetism draws them to want to be closer. I care for them and know they have great qualities, but I also know that I'm not sure I can be captured and pinned at this time in my life.

    Like I said, I don't want to loose any of them. I believe they are in my life for a reason. The last few days I may have figured it out. I don't like the way things have played out, but know if this is truly they way things are meant to be than it is easier to deal with.

    the old boyfriend-I learned I was too open with

    the friend I had feelings for and all the friends I have now-not open at all

    the friend I made over the weekend-had one line he said to me that cleared everything up....."You choose your words TOO carefully. with me, tell me the first thing on your mind. I'm a big boy and you can't hurt me." I believe he is here in my life to help balance how I portray my emotions. He came at a very crucial time and I just have a feeling it is all for a reason.

    Friends are such special angels!



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