Calling out to all Scorpio's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



  • ConfusedScorpion,

    As confusing as you think your reply may sound....it makes total sense to me!! I have been dealing with my Scorp for 5 years now and initially I was very distant and played hard to get. He loved that and the more I refused and pulled away...the more he chased. Things changed along the way and being the impatient and aggressive Aries woman that I am, I started to be clingy a little bit. Showing too much affection and it scared him. I am now a much stronger and more mature Aries and while it still gets difficult for me to sometimes control my emotions, I am a lot better with it now and I have become hip to his way of doing things so I try to kind of back off and give him space but I will send him little cute text message every now and then. Something like "I am just sending some good energy and vibrations your way" or "I know you are busy with work so I am sending some of my strength, patience and love your way...talk to you later" I try to let him know that I am thinking about him and I care but at the same time I am letting him know that I am in no rush to see him because I don't ask to see him. There are times when I lose patience and I want to see him so I will reach out to him but trust me...that doesn't happen too often. What throws us off balance is when I do reach out to him and he doesn't reply.....that drives me insane and then anger takes over. I either end up sending him a nasty text or email which believe me I really try not to do or I just ignore him totally and when we finally do speak he may detect the annoyance in my voice. I guess I will take your advice as best I can and try to tell him what is bothering me then change the subject and remain upbeat. This, my friend will be a real challenge for me...especially since us Aries folks have quite the temper and it usually takes us a little time to relax and return to a calm state. But I know this will be good for us to practice. Thanks again!! May God continue to bless your relationship 😉



  • Aw thank you! I know abut the temper part, we are the same way. Watching other people's temper has calmed mine down a lot. I still have regrets after I'm pushed but I recently after saying one mean sentence turned it around and said no you're not going to get me upset and I walked away. Then when he came near me and spoke I let it go. Things just blurt out sometimes and then I feel awful that I didn't handle it better. I keep reminding myself if I want him to respond like an adult, then I have to act like one to. 🙂

    Once you see him respond the first time after you say it and then change the subject, it gets easier and easier. It will be your aha! moment. Give it a try more than once though, don't give up if you think it's not working. He may be just waiting on his right time to bring it up.

    I pick sometimes and do to him what he does and then we start laughing. He thinks it absurd. At first he looks shocked then when he realizes what I'm doing he starts trying to hide his smile. I've said it's not fun is it? and I may poke or tickle him so I can make myself laugh.

    Humor can be so hard when you've got steam coming out your ears but it does get better.



  • ConfusedScorpion,

    Good morning....so we met this past weekend and I used your approach. I started by playing a game with him...I asked him first to tell me what bothered him the most about people. His answer "I hate selfish people". I then gave him my answer..."I hate nosy people". Then I said "there is actually something else that bothers me a bit but its about you...is it okay if I tell you?" His answer "Oh boy, here we go" So I said "it is not negative and I don't have to tell you if you don't want me to" So he said "No please do tell" I told him that it bothered me when he distances himself from me. I told him that I didn't know why he was doing it and it made me feel as if I was doing something wrong. I then quickly changed the subject and started talking about something silly. In the middle of me changing the subject he said "There are some things that can't be said" I pretended to ignore him...I don't know if that was the right thing to do at that moment but I felt that if I started to dwell on it and ask more questions it probably would have gotten to a point where none of us really wanted to go at least not at that moment. Now I just wonder what he meant by that. I can say ConfusedScorpio, that I feel good about saying it because at least he knows now how it makes me feel when he disappears. I don't know if he knew that beforehand but at least I put it out there and I think it may have him thinking now. I am a bit nervous though...I don't know if my saying it had a positve or negative impact on him. Either way, I feel at ease putting it out there...I am tired of keeping things to myself just because I am afraid of what his reaction will be. Well, let's see what happens. I will keep you posted.

    Be safe and blessed always...

    -Aries22



  • I'm so glad you were able to try. I wonder what he meant by some things can't be said to. I could think of several things, but not really sure, unless he means he can't put words to his feelings yet. At least he responded without accusing you of wanting to pick an argument. That is a huge accomplishment! I hope the weekend ended well. I'm so happy for you!!!!! I wouldn't try to discuss anything of importance with him the next few times you're together unless it's something unforeseeable. You don't want him to start dreading the discussions. Men! It seems so unfair at times that we need to keep things in just for their ego. I usually don't but a scorpio gets scared and feels uneasy when discussing issues, so it's best to take it slow. You did good, you put it out there and then backed away. As far as taking it negative or positive, consider how your day or night went after that. You would have known instantly if he had felt negative towards it. If you continued on and had a nice time, he should be fine. He's probably just thinking about why he does it. He probably doesn't know why either. Sometimes when we're afraid of commitment, we're the last to know. That's like when we wear an ugly shirt, everyone else knows it but us, we have to be told sometimes. He'll work through it. Good luck! I can't wait to see how it gets easier for you. xoxoxo



  • ConfusedScorpion,

    Thanks!! You are the woman!!! LOL Things continued to go well after that but again that over analyzing thing I do until I have driven myself and the other person crazy is all part of my paranoid Aries thing LOL. I always second guess things...its my biggest downfall. I wil definitely keep you in the loop.

    TTYL,

    Aries22



  • ConfusedScorpion,

    How are you? You would not believe....he continues to do it. We had a great time this weekend and I have reached out to him 2x so far and no reply. UNBELIEVABLE!!!

    -Aries22



  • Aries22, pull back. For now on only contact him once. He either gets the message or he doesn't. See if that does the trick. If he's not responding after the 2X or 3X time he has become complacent and lazy, feeling you will be there for him, so there's no chase for him.

    Just food for thought.



  • Hi ConfusedScorpion - before I bother anyone else with my bigger questions - I thought I would ask you another question about my Scorpio friend. I am a bit ticked off. He was supposed to do a little work for me (he's my friend but I am paying him to do the job). Well - w had it set for last week but on Sunday he called me and said it was looking like rain and he needed a couple or 3 days of no rain to do the job. So I have been watching the weather report.

    He told me he was not going to take a trip to help a friend of his move because next week he was going in for surgery. So here are 3 days of sunshine and then almost 2 weeks of rain and I was supposed to get this job done before the end of the year for tax purposes. So I called him a couple days ago - got machine. Emailed him - no reply. Called today - voice mail went right to machine. Well - day after tomoorow its gonna be raining again. Then Christmas etc. I am about to call to see if someone else can do the job but now with the rain, it won't get done.

    Perhaps he did take the trip to help his friend move. Perhaps he went in for surgery earlier than he anticipated. Perhaps his GF gave him issues about talking to me again and he's laying low. Should I consider myself "blown off" or wait to see if there is a valid reason for his lack of communication? I have to tell you - I don't buy many excuses anymore and I really tend not to have much patience for BS - my Geminii almost ex-husband have me anough of that.

    I find it hard to believe that he is blowing me off. He said he was "on my team." which I thought meant he was my friend. so what do you think?



  • DivineMuse,

    Thanks for the advice and believe me...I know that I definitely need to do that. I am caught between a rock and a hard place. I am always one of two extremes...either I am into you or I don't give a crap about you. I have been really trying to become this balanced individual...I am getting there but it's tough. For now I will definitely back off. Thank you and be blessed.

    -Aries22



  • Heck! Just been reading this tread! I am a Scorpion but NO not a confused one like this! Give him the boot! He just want you in his web and brag about it! Scorpions DO NOT play with people's feelings as that is one thing they DONT like people doing to them. They dont like lies, but then he is not telling lies but you are playing his guesing game are'nt you? He is also confusion you to "hang around" in case the other relationship does not work. O Hell No ! Look for a more stable Scorpion, you will be better off you poor thing AND I AM A SCORPION!



  • Hey Aries, sorry I've been away so long. You have been given good advice. Divinemuse was right on. Pull back. If he cares for you, he will sense that he screwed up and you will find out his true intentions. It is hard being balanced with any relationship. Just always remember what you value and use that as your guide.

    As far as being paranoid...Sometimes it's hard to find that line of not being used and that line of being overly critical. (My children tell me I expect to much out of people, even though I'm first to say no one is perfect.) Ask yourself all the questions: Are you happy with him when you're together? Do you feel like there is someone else? Is he good to you and honest, respectful and loyal? Does he use you physically or financially? Etc. If you have more good answers than bad ones and you are truly happy, learn how to seperate yourself from him so you aren't depending on him for your happiness and that way you can stop worrying so much. Worry will kill any relationship, regardless of who you are. On the other hand, if a person is making you worry to the point where you spend more time worrying than enjoying your relationship, then you may be trying to tell yourself something...

    When I love someone, I'm not going to cause their worries. If he continues to allow you to worry instead of putting your mind at ease, maybe it's time to reasses what you want from a relationship. If he tries calming your worries and you still worry, you need another outlet. Something to seperate you from him.

    I completely agree with Divinemuse, pull back. Take time to think about what you want from a relationship. Give him some space, if he doesn't want the space you'll know. Also, what do you mean you reached out to him twice so far? Are you talking about contacting him or are you talking about telling him what's bothering you? If it was what's bothering you, was it about the same thing?



  • Hey Chappies, I'm not confused about Scorpios. I expected this type of response some time or another when I created the name so it's okay. I stated earlier what I was confused about though.

    You're right, some scorpios are stable and mature and some are not. But, there's no evidence that there is someone else besides Aries. She stated that she worries alot like a lot of people do, including myself. When there is unnecessary worry involved, it may just be that we want things perfect and that doesn't always happen in any relationship. We just have to learn balance and how to communicate this part of us and to not depend on the other person for happiness. Sometimes we're so happy that we want to spend all our time together and it's just not healthy. The healthiest relationships are those that are capable of spending time apart without jealousy. Aries will figure this out in her own time and way. If he's good to her, maybe she can start a hobby or business, something to seperate herself from him and the worry may decrease once her mind is involved in something else and ony on him as time permits. And on the other hand if he's not good for her, she will figure this out also.

    I agree in not wasting time on someone that isn't good to you but if they're good to you and you are only trying to understand them better and to stop worrying over something, if it's nothing, then I applaud her for trying to find balance.

    Some scorpio men are not the easiest people in the world to have relationship related conversations with. It doesn't mean they don't want to, some just don't know how. If you're one of the few that can sit down with your woman and discuss all relationship issues without fussing, then I am impressed. It takes most of them most of their life to even get to a point where they can discuss more than two or three sentences honestly without fussing. Notice I said honestly, usually the ones that are capable of this are not being honest, they are shooting lines of crap. I'm not downing scorpios, I am a scorpio. But, most of them that sit down and discuss faithfulness, etc. are not telling the truth. Some of the smoothest talkers have been known to almost collect women and talk repeatedly about being only with one woman. Those are the ones that should definitely be dumped.



  • ConfusedScorpion,

    Thank you for shedding some light on this and having my back. When I told you that I reached out to him I meant via text/email just to say hello...I never brought up that subject again. I have totally backed off since I read Divinemuse's reply. I have also been distracted for the last couple of days since I just recently had a death in my family so I really don't have time to waste on his nonsense. I will keep you posted on all details. Thanks again for being you. 1000 blessings for you and your family always.

    -Aries22



  • Aries22 - All I can say is I wish you the best and sometimes no answer is an answer, but it at least lets you know to move on to someone who will treat you better. =D



  • Hi ConfusedScorpion,

    Can u enlighten me as well based on a scorpion 😉

    Thanks a million.

    I'm in love with a lady...she's 11yrs younger than i am. I'm 5Mar1976 (Pisces) and she's 4Nov1987 (Scorpion).

    We have been together since Apr this yr. We really enjoyed one another...Happy, laughters..enjoy doing things together, cooking for one another etc...having same thots and reading one another's mind accurately....and we compliment one another sexually as well. This type of chemistry was never found in my previous relationships and as such, i treasure her very much.

    The problem between us now is that her family disapprove of our relationship. And as she is still in school...there is no way she will be able to leave her home to be with me....she have to ans to her parents and have to live off them etc. She does not have the freedom financially to live with me and she doesnt want to live off me as well. She felt stress at times when i complained that she does not spend enough time with me...she explained that she got to balance her family and me. and most of the time, she gotto lie to her family in going out and spending time with me....she felt stressed having to lie most of the time and is trying her best.....i'm sadden....

    I would very much like to have a future with her...spend the rest of my life with her and love her faithfully if she permits....but i dun seems to have the security in me. At times, she doesnt make me feels that i will have a future with her. And seeing her agony in having to lie to her family to be with me makes me want to end this relationship....

    I'm confused...what should i do? To carry on the lie? or to wait for her....

    Thanks a million!

    Fishy76



  • Fishy76 - I think that if the family disapproves of your relationship due to cultural/religious reasons and her culture and religion are a major part of her life than that will be difficult.

    Its one thing if they don't like you because say your line of work or income level. Any scorpio can get over that. But if her family is important to her and what they disapprove of would cause a rift in her family she may choose the family over you. Even keeping a lie is choosing the family over you.

    Scorpio or not if she's lying about your relationship that's not healthy for either of you and you should either end the relationship and find someone who can stand up to her family or someone whose family will not have such strong cultural objections. I'm not saying what they are doing is right, just i know friends that take out a whole segment of the dating block, because they've come to the decision that having that type of stress is not worth it to them. It's their decision, you have to respect it, but it seems your GF hasn't made a decision as to what is more important you or the family. Though for all indicators the family is winning. Just my thoughts.



  • I am a female Cap who has had a younger Scorpio male friend for many years. We went to movies, concerts, dances together. We have always had a lot of fun! He asked me to his prom but I declined. I just don't feel the same way about him as he has felt about me. He now is living with another woman plus has two or three children. I don't have any and my husband died in 2007. I don't want him to feel that I don't like him but he is with someone else and I am not going to get in the middle of his relationship with that woman. I don't need that drama. Am I right?



  • DivineMuse,

    Thank you. I actually did hear from him....let's see what happens.



  • Hey Aries, I am so sorry for your loss in your family. As if holidays aren't hard enough some times... You're right, you need to focus on your family. They need you right now, you also need his support right now. Is he aware of your loss and available to be here for you?

    Thank you so much for your blessings. Much needed!!!!!!!



  • Fishy76, Only you know the answer to this question. You have to weigh your factors, your pros and cons. If I'm understanding correctly, she is in college. She should be graduating very soon if she's 23, depending on when she started. Once she graduates, she will be able to obtain a good paying job so she will be able to support herself and not lean on her parents. The two of you need to disuss your future together and see if you are on the same page. Discuss long term goals and plans, you will know where her heart is. I understand that different religions have different values... in the Christian community, husbands and wives leave parents and become one with their partners.

    Speaking from personal experience, my mother didn't like my choice for a husband either and it made me sick from worry. I felt like I was stuck in the middle trying to keep both sides happy. I finally got to the point where I stood back and told them if they wanted to hate each other, they could fuss all they wanted and I didn't want to hear one thing about it, that I was tired of being upset because they could not learn to get along. It took awhile, but once our child was born, they became best friends. They actually became closer than I was with her. They talked on the phone every day and cooked for each other. It turned out just like it should have.

    Sometimes, parents are so caught up in their own thoughts, they forget to step back and consider who they are hurting. They believe they are protecting their children, but are ony causing misery. If she loves you as much as you feel towards her, and if its meant to be, it will all work out in due time.

    Also, keep in mind, she is young and does not have the experience in life as you. Could she be holding back for reasons other than just her parents? You are older and thinking of starting a life with someone. You need to make sure she shares the same visions as you. Sit down and talk about your future once she is able to provide for herself and you will find your answers. She may not know what she wants right now. I do not know her personally but for her to discuss needing balance is a good thing. Some 23 year olds have no clue how to do this. Some adults do not even know how to do this.

    Ask her what her future plans and goals are. Good luck! I wish you the best!!!!


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