Parent-Child Compatibility

  • Hello, I'd be interested to know me and my mum's compatibility

  • Dear Generous Captain!

    I thank you so very much for the VERY interesting reading about my kiddos and myself!

    Fascinating because, my firstborn is a grown man now-and your take was totally Sonshine-he's almost 20, and as he's matured...let's say your take is getting truer and truer! My "baby" (16 1/2!), she and I are just as you described...

    So, again-Thanks SO much and Verrrry our children grow up-dynamics change.

    My husband would be most appreciative to glean any info re: him and our kids...I'm sure you're swamped, but whenever-if ever! I'd love it, as well! Especially re: our daughter and him.

    Idk, I'll include my firstborn who was 12 when my hubby met him...but they're pretty close.


    Daddy Walter: 11/13/1952

    Rafi (stepson): 12/26/1976

    Jesse ( his firstborn, a son): 12/02/1990

    Anastasia ( his baby!): 3/04/1994

    I truly am grateful for your time, Captain! Thanks!

    Lisa 😉

  • Thank you so much Captain!

    You are spot on with my son. We have always butt heads and had power struggles on what he feels is "fair". And during the divorce with his dad, although showed emotions, never wanted to talk about them. I would sit for hours holding him trying to get him to talk. I think we can find ways to compromise when he is not on his rampage. 12 is a tough age ya know :).

    I have yet to experience any of the conflict with my daughter. I'm sure it will come seeing as she is only 9 at the time. but "Your daughter is here in this life to use her naturally expressive energies to give rise to a unique form of creativity - to put her quick mind, enjoyment of language and technical proficiency to productive work by contributing something unusual to the world. Her need for recognition will drive her to follow her inspiration and intuition and to act upon it. Lack of ideas or enthusiasm will never be a problem for her" You are sooooo right!!!!

    She loves all aspects of art. She LOVES to draw, paint, make up stories, dance~just all of it. She doesn't let us throw any thing away because it is too special. She still has the most vivid imagination anyone has ever seen!

    Again, thank you. This will help so much in raising them to their potential and not resenting me. 🙂

  • Aqua2378 - that was part of TheTransformed's reading for her daughter, not yours.

  • Moonalisa and mother: family relationships in this combination often manifest a lot of friction, with a lot of fighting over who is right and condemnatory finger-pointing over who is wrong. The satisfaction of the 'I-told-you-so' attitude can appear in your interactions over how a situation will turn out. Struggles over which person is to be the boss or authority figure are bound to be severe. Thus, your conflicts and arguments are likely to focus on who is right, who was right the last time, and who will be right in the future. But even when you two have strong hunches about how things will turn out, you inevitably look to some other source to back up what you think. There is usually some big difference between you two, perhaps of stature, background, philosophy or ideology that belies or obscures your empathic bond. You both hate when other people make prejudicial assumptions such as racial or sexist slurs and you will either withdraw in distaste or go on the attack. If you are to have any harmony between you, you both must agree not to disagree too openly - others may not like watching you fight. Be tolerant and open to new ideas. Give up know-it-all attitudes. Your mother has a big need to control and she was born with a powerful nature that can assert itself in most situations. She is here to gain insight into how power works and how to use it intelligently. Marked by a great intensity, she is a hard-driving soul who must learn to see beyond her own narrow self-interest. Fearless and gifted with great authority, she can neverthless get stuck in purely personal pursuits that fail to afford her spiritual growth. Eventually however, she should discover that the ability to dominate others isn't everything and that, while confrontations and the search for peak experiences may be exciting, such activities lose their lustre over time. Still, her love of the truth and her admirable loyalty will help her discover that her true joy lies in nurturing others. If she is careful to channel her prodigious energies into greater understanding, not merely greater force, all will go well for her.

  • Score

    Husband and stepson Rafi: a family matchup here may be somewhat too fixed in its orientation to allow much freedom of expression or thought. Parent and stepchild will have to work hard to drop stereotypes or expectations that inhibit spontaneous expression. Struggles with the parent's authority may appear. Avoiding making and imposing too many rules will help, but compromising one's beliefs is not necessary. A loose and easy relationship works best here. These two are both serious and dedicated people but together they can indulge their lighter side and have fun together if they choose. Problems can arise as to who is the star but for the most part, if both do their part, the relationship can be harmonious.

    Husband and Jesse: in this combination the father will often try to control his son, to little avail however. His attempts may raise the son's temperature with the result that he either fights or flees. The father can be a tough customer in battle, and Jesse for his part will usually refuse to admit defeat. There is definitely love between them, but it is seldom of the completely unconditional sort - both will usually hold back from giving their all, even when they seem to be in harmony. Two possible scenarios can occur during their interactions. Either they will waste their time - with the father trying to boss the son around and Jesse rebelling, or more meaningfully, they will combine their talents in an all-out assault on any closed minds and reactionary attitudes of those around them. The choice is theirs - work together or against each other. Finding a creative outlet for any aggression would be beneficial as would unconditional love-giving.

    Husband and daughter: this relationship is an interesting mix of give and take, with affection, attention and absorption in each other's lives and work all playing a part. As family members, they can have a strong career connection, which may become the bedrock of their relationship. Both are very private people and need to be alone a good deal of the time, and so respecting each other's space is usually a requirement they can meet. On the other hand, they are both prone to escapes of different kinds, and should they fall into a habituating or outright addictive form of escape together, their bond could easily become unhealthy. This can be an emotionally complex matchup. Your husband doesn't like anyone to be too dependent on him and your daughter can be extremely needy at times. The other side of the coin is your husband's need to control, which Anastasia usually will accept with little resistence. Emotional manipulation can be quite common here and the fine art of persuasion can reach a high level of sophistication. Each partner will manage to get their way a sufficient part of the time through compromise, trade-offs, mildly coercive acts and other clever strategems. These maneuverings are not necessarily serious and can even be quite playful in nature. These two will stick together over the years and separations will be quite painful.

  • Oh my gosh TheCaption!! So spot on with me and my daughters!! You have confirmed many of my intuits concerning them as well!!! THank you so much!!

    Would it be possible to do the compatibility of them with their father?

    He (dad) Oct 7, 1960

    Oldest daughter Sept 14, 1990

    Youngest daughter Apr 2, 1993

  • That was another step in understanding myself, her and our relation. Many thank yous.

  • TheTransformed

    Dad and oldest daughter: this relationship can be trusting, open, even innocent. As such it has the capacity to breathe fresh air into the viewpoints of two often jaded individuals. These two are tough nuts when it comes to the rest of humanity, and sensing the ability to let down their guard in this relationship can give them a whole new energy level and a new lease on life. They may find that they are able to tackle projects together that would have daunted them alone. in fact, the relaxation here may foster a whole new level of creativity for them. These two usually have a positive effect on other family members. Their attitude is generally constructive and they enjoy playing a low-key but significant role in family activities. Occasionally their 'innocence' can irritate people who see it as a ploy to avoid work or responsibility. Generally speaking, this relationship may need to adopt more mature attitudes if it is to escape the accusation of acting childishly or irresponsibly, and to gain the respect of others.

    Dad and youngest daughter: this combination offers a good example of how a relationship can create synergies. When faced with problems or challenges, for example, the daughter will act more from instinct while her more mental father will hang back a bit. Yet this combinations's great strengths are neither instinct nor thought but emotion, feeling, and empathy. In the long run, the relationship will give each person the sensitivity to know and understand the other's feelings. Your daughter's outspokenness and her father's reflectiveness may occasionally conflict, yet each has much to learn from the other. Often a procrastinator, the father may admire his daughter's ability to make up her mind and act without endless contemplation. Your headstrong daughter for her part may learn from her dad how to be less rash and to use her common sense. Given the differences in each person's orientation, it may be surprising that things can work out here. That both people enjoy having fun is a big plus, owed largely to your daughter who can help protect her father from being at the mercy of his dark side with her playful qualities and also her understanding - she knows what it is to be beset by moodiness herself and can usually handle it better in others than deal with her own demons. Freedom and responsiblity must be balanced here by both this pair. A truly unselfish love is possible between them, as long as your daughter is not overly egotisitical and doesn't ignore her father's needs. He meanwhile must respect her need for independence, yet without being masochistic and losing self-respect.

  • Hi Captain: Here you go:

    Me - 3/14/1958 04:19 Central time

    Almost exhusband (could be here for a lot longer) 6/12/1961 - about 4:25 PM PST

    My oldest daughter 10/01/1995 ( Born - 10:54 PM Pacific standard time )

    Youngest daughter 01/10/2001 (born 11:01 AM pacific standard time)

    Youngest daughter is developmentally delayed. Oldest daughter is very bright - has ADD and is often mean to me. Gets along with daddy. Not with me though and she always gets her way.Little one just wants everyone to get along and everything to be peaceful. Thanks!

  • Captain....

    Ohhhhhh! Sorry about that!

    Then really none of it helps me with her. I actually couldn't connect any that you said with her. I just haven't seen it yet. Maybe her sensitivity and intuitive gifts. She is always talking about things she sees or knows. But I just reply with "Really?!" and she'll keep going on with a story. I guess I'll keep any eye out for the rest.

    Thank you so much though!

  • Captain....

    Ohhhhhh! Sorry about that!

    Then really none of it helps me with her. I actually couldn't connect any that you said with her. I just haven't seen it yet. Maybe her sensitivity and intuitive gifts. She is always talking about things she sees or knows. But I just reply with "Really?!" and she'll keep going on with a story. I guess I'll keep any eye out for the rest.

    Thank you so much though!

  • Wondering if you could read my father and I. He passed away recently and we were estranged. Pretty confused while trying to mentally/emotionally process his death (lots of things that hinder the grief/mourning)

    My DOB: March 6 1987

    His DOB: November 7 1946 (DOD: October 24 2010, if that is useful in any way)

  • Sorry Aqua2378, I didn't mean you. I posted my reply in the wrong section. What I said originally does indeed refer to your daughter.

  • Has anyone else been experiencing some problems posting? Things seem to get deleted or moved around lately.

  • Turtledust

    You and oldest daughter: family relationships here often focus on exploring the unknown, perhaps through an interest in science fiction or metaphysics and the like, perhaps through personal exploration. Your daughter may be skeptical about indulging in this sort of activity at the outset, but through her relationship with you, her reluctant curiosity can become an avidity for finding out more. The greater her initial resistence to such studies, the deeper her immersion in them later on (generally speaking), much to your delight. This relationship is apt to involve itself heavily in a detailed examination of all aspects of life, focusing on the operations of chance, syncronicity, prophecy, and ESP. In some ways the matchup could be described as a duel between an arch-skeptic and an arch-believer. Although this characterization is a bit extreme, there is more than a grain of truth to it. Your daughter often depends solely on her rational faculties and denies what she cannot comprehend through her five senses. You on the other hand happily put your faith in what cannot be seen, which has just as much reality to you; you also view everyday objects and events as being imbued wuith supernatural powers or significance and may be frustrated by your daughter's (and others) inability to recognize the miraculous in the mundane. Your daughter finds this approach impractical, even ridiculous and her attitude to you may reflect her belief that you are just a hopeless, clueless dreamer who has lost touch with the real world. Yet you both value the unexpected, the unpremeditated, and the spontaneous in your interactions. Turtledust, you must show your daughter that she can follow both heart and head. Be realistic but don't compromise your beliefs. Trust your senses and your judgment. Your daughter's need for perfection can lead her somewhat astray in life. A preoccupation with trying to 'fix' what isn't necessarily broken to begin with may manifest as a desire for control, thus stalling her in power struggles that can keep her from doing her soul's work. Also her attention to detail may result in her turning away from the larger awareness necessary for this lifepath. Physically intense, she may move through a series of love partners in search of one who meets her overly high expectations. She may be further hampered by a snobbish or elitist attitude, believing perhaps that no one is ever quite good enough, and thus ending up alone. Still, she is blessed with a capacity for self-discipline that will foster the expansion of self-knowledge needed to succeed here. If she can abandon her somewhat defensive attitude and make a greater effort to inspire others and convince them of the sincerity of her efforts towards inner growth, all will go well.

    Your almost-ex and oldest daughter: there may be an aspect of dishonesty or lack of trust in this relationship. The child may feel that everything between her and her father is running smoothly when the truth is just the opposite. More openness and sharing is called for here. Neither of this pair has much staying power on their own but together their relationship may endure. However the relationship is challenged by the task of balancing each person's energies - these two are both air signs, connected with thought, but together their relationship is governed by fire, the element of passion and drive. So they can be good for each other as long as that passion and drive is put to constructive use and achieves something of value. This relationship can powerfully influence those around it and can leap large hurdles. However this pair often has a blind spot and don't realise how their fiery union can burn other family members or friends. The balance that is needed here will lie in agreements, verbal or unspoken, to behave in a way that promotes harmony and minimises upset for all concerned.

    You and youngest daughter: your child will indulge you but will also want to control and manipulate you, mostly in a benign way. This relationship can exhibit great humanity and an accompanying desire to better the lives of others, both in the immediate environment and beyond. However you can both be rather gullible when it comes to accepting the promises of others. Your daughter is ruggedly fair and honest in her accepting attitude to everyone, and you are universal enough in your thinking to eschew any selfish striving after material means. Idealistic in the extreme, this relationship will have to make a firm effort to stay grounded and realistic. You can both be a bit naive to abuses of power and must try to be more tough and demanding of your rights, to insist that guarantees be backed up with rock-solid commitment. Though you may sometimes wish to escape your responsibility to your child, she will help to ground you in your duties. You will have to be careful though that trust and acceptance doesn't become an issue between you if you fail to keep your word or obligation, as your daughter can be stonily unforgiving and unyielding in this regard. Your daughter's principal spiritual challenges will revolve around issues of tolerance - of both herself and others. She must learn to balance her moral viewpoint with a healthy dose of understanding. Born with a need for material security, she will conversely be attracted to the unusual, the mysterious, and even the bizarre. However this attraction may be rigorously or fearfully repressed or manifested in some deeply ambivalent relationships as she seeks to act out her urges through others. Yet she has much creativity and imagination (though she may see them as nameless threats to be conquered) and if she can learn to embrace her more outrageous inclinations and to love herself through increased understanding, she will achieve the self-confidence to accept who she is.

    Your almost-ex and youngest daughter: this relationship's outlook is quite childlike in nature, with enthusiasm and a positive outlook as two of its main qualities. It does miss the obvious however, in that in most situations there is a path of least resistance that a more mature outlook is better able to discern. To a child, everything seems monumental but this can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. These two share a need to win, even against overwhelming odds. The father may simultaneously both resist and depend on the more stable aspects of his daughter's personality. This relationship may make him assume more responsibility than he likes - he may resent this but it can also give him more confidence to succeed. This youngest daughter can thus arouse very ambivalent feelings in her father. They can be very competitive in some areas and may even assume adversarial roles in which they spur each other on to new heights as rivals for affection/attention, which strangely can bind them even closer together.

  • Tooralooryeaye

    You and your father: this combination is difficult for a family relationship. You were/are both very emotional people. Your father could be highly controlling, possessive, and demanding of attention. This relationship can bring out both persons' determined sides, with good and bad results. It can help you to achieve the things in life you want but will create much friction in the home and family. Usually this determination benefits you more than your father. The relationship has both an earthy, intensely practical, and responsible side that pushes towards action and effort on the one hand - plus a conflicting pull towards relaxation and procrastination on the other. A common interest like sports, career ties, or a shared hobby would have made things easier between you. It could have lured you two away from pressing duties and become a dominant focus of your life together. Your relationship can be tightly knit and hard to dissolve, though neither of you may have been very interested in self-analysis to find out why and what you felt and behaved towards the other as you did. Your father may have manifested some rather bizarre or downright peculiar inclinations. But, even if he seemed like the proverbial boy-next-door, there was bound to be something diifferent about him, and he may have found his life difficult unless he acquired a greater willingness to open up and share his uniqueness with the world. He was very concerned with whether people liked and accepted him, maybe too much. He could display an engaging and social side, though his thoughts and emotions likely ran deep. His difficulty was in sharing his feelings in a way that other people could relate to - he could be inarticulate, belligerent, defensive, and insecure at times. Cooperating with others was hard for him despite having an agile clever mind, creativity, and a gift for innovation. With his attention focused so squarely on his public image, he could be a grandstander and his need for attention may have worn rather thin with those close to him. Deep down, he never really felt understood or had much confidence in himself and this lead to much personal frustration. Deceived by self-interest, he may have been attracted to those who could help him achieve his ambitions but may have cut himself off from or undervalued those who really cared for or loved him and whom he most needed. His life purpose was to build bridges of understanding with others.

  • Thank you TheCaptain!! Right on point as always:) You are much appreciated.

    Love and Light to you!

  • Dear Captain,

    If you are still being so kind as sharing your insight, I would love a reading with my children.

    Me- April 11th, 1980

    Older son- March 13th, 2007

    Younger son- October 22nd, 2008

    Ex-husband- March 23rd, 1976

    Thank you so much for your kindness and your time.


  • Hobbles76

    You and your older son: frustration can occur here with an inability of both parties to reach a deep emotional level together. The relationship often retains a naive childlike attitude in which neither person wants to understand the other all that well because they are so very different. Interactions can be a little uneasy then, although you two will maintain an atmosphere of honesty, but not always comprehension or sympathy. Your son can grow to become jealous of your ability to attract followers through teaching - he usually will want nothing more than to affect his environment in this kind of way but will have more difficulty doing so. Yet you can can form a close personal bond if you want, by admiring and accepting each other's different talents, abilities, and approaches. But emotional closeness may always be elusive. You both have far-reaching ideas but you Hobbles are more concerned with your fellow human beings and with society as a whole - your son more with philosophical and universal concerns. You are a doer and he is a dreamer, basically. You may think he is unrealistic and too taken up with cosmic, fantastic or new age pursuits, while he may come to see you as being too involved in messy, interpersonal and idealistic endeavours that don't enhance your personal growth. You may be frustrated by your son's tendency to periodically sink into lethargy or self-pity and to be unavailable to you when you need him. He will however have the technical skills, better financial judgment, and imagination to make things happen with you behind him pushing him gently along. You may also have plenty of ideas but be unable to see how to put them into practice which is where your son can help. Know and use your individual strengths to help the other person achieve their dreams. Your son is a gifted individual who may nevertheless have to face down the demons of carelessness and superficiality before he can come to terms with a higher spiritual awakening. Learning how to make a commitment to something he loves (be it a person, principal, or endeavour) will help him acquire focus and depth. He will no doubt have many passions and be characterised by a tendency to wear his heart on his sleeve, so he may scatter his energies by becoming emotionally overextended. If he can cultivate a deeper knowledge of himself and commit to those things that are both positive and nurturing, his true calling or cause will soon reveal itself.

    Ex-husband and older son: these two have a strong orientation towards life experience over book learning. Individually they each have a tendency to want to live an experience rather than just read about it, but together they take this quality to and beyond the limit. They not only recognise a kindred spirit in each other but eventually realise that a common life path will offer fantastic opportunities. The relationship is usually built less around psychological exploration than around shared activities, which represent its best chance for success. If things don't work out however, this will be hardest on your son who generally adopts a more submissive role and may become dependent on his father. If either ends up rejecting the other, the father may withdraw from the relationship, often with little warning. The father may also get frustrated or bored with his son's complacency, passivity, or self-satisfaction. The son may be left bewildered and confused, and likely in the grip of a deep depression. The danger in this relationship is that it may be too superficial or overly concerned with appearances.

    You and your younger son: again you are both very different personalities. You are both fascinated by ideas but your approaches in this area are extremely different. You Hobbles will enthusiastically support concepts that you believe provide a basis for your own actions while your son is more intellectual and objective, rarely letting ideas control his life. A certain level of conflict can ensue as you two try to balance your opposing views. You both have a concern for your fellow human beings and are drawn to group efforts - you can work well together in a social or service setting where the welfare of others is the primary concern. Together you can be a powerful force for community good. You two are less effective however in the family situation where a host of personal irritations and emotional conflicts can cause unsettling oscillations of mood. Your son has intense and complex feelings, and your straightforwardness may not be the most calming or effective way of approaching him. You are usually much too busy getting the job done to stop and argue with your son and are likely to consider what you see as bad behaviour or negative criticism from him an annoyance or hindrance. Not to be taken seriously will be unbearable to your son and, if this reaction becomes a pattern, it can destroy the relationship. Try to keep things easy and light between you. Your son can spend a lot of time at war within himself and everybody else until he learns the fine art of integrating his mind and emotions. Gifted with a dramatic and often quite compelling persona, he will show a gift for airing his opinions and views, though he may not practice what he preaches until he comes to terms with his own problems. Entering into a healthy balanced relationship with someone who is a good role model is essential and will certainly help him achieve balance in himself. Rigidity and an over-critical attitude may hinder his progress through life but personal transformation will always be somewhere on his agenda, so all should be well.

    Ex-husband and younger son: this relationship is likely to be an uncertain, unconventional, explosive, and highly unpredictable one. They are both very emotional types. This relationship can classically produce extremes of pleasure and pain, with both peak experiences and depressions manifesting with some regularity. To avoid emotional, psychological, or in extreme cases physical damage, limits may have to be placed on what is or is not allowed. Care must be taken to guard against jealousy, should this pair try to compete for the attention of those around them or the spotlight. On the other hand, each may well stimulate the other's more flamboyant side, making for a lively and at times contentious exchange that those around them may find highly entertaining, if it doesn't go too far. The secret to harmony here is to tone down excess, stay on an even keel, and learn to live a more ordinary, albeit perhaps boring, level of existence together. Douse the flames but don't lose the spark.

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