You and your son: serious struggles over authority can result in a family relationship here. This can persist into the child's adult life, and can involve such issues as finances, inheritances and dominance in the family group (your son is actually gifted with financial astuteness, as long as his judgment is not clouded by emotion, so it may pay to follow his advice). The key to avoiding strife is your ability to leave him alone as much as possible. You will be called on however to waken your son from the lethargy and depression he can fall into and inspire him to take part in the world around him. This relationship will have to deal with a lot of uncertainty and instability - your son will be patient, long-suffering and watchful whereas you are impatient and in a hurry to move onto something new. Differences in tempo, style and feeling can cause problems here. Your son may resent your leadership and may see you as inflexible and dictatorial. He will tend to repress his emotions and you yourself dislike messy scenes so there may be a buildup of unexpressed feelings that can explode at the most awkward times unless you both learn to share more of yourselves with each other. As his mother you will have to learn when to show concern and when to back off, because your son will have a deep need to be mothered yet at times will also be moody and withdrawn.
Your son will do well to stay in close touch with his personal source of power in order to make this a successful and rewarding life journey. The sooner he formulates a clear idea of what he wants out of life, the less risk he runs of getting bogged down in a world of emotion or of exalting his own sense of suffering as a substitute for a clear sense of personal ambition. Setting well-defined goals and building real self-esteem will be especially important for him, as will the ability to apply his considerable powers of concentration to his career or financial endeavours. In any event, he would do well to avoid seeking a means of escape through addictions, sexual permissiveness, or an indulgence of his darker fantasies. Directing his emotional energies outward in sustained, substantial effort will prove most rewarding for him and will result in the sense of certainty, power and control he so desires. But he will have to become more indifferent to others' opinions of him if he wants to succeed. Don't be alarmed if, in his evolution towards greater inner strength, he seems to transform from 'nice' to 'tough' at some point. He is deeply empathic and sensitive and is just moving away from being able to be manipulated by anybody to standing firm in his own beliefs. If you dont try to control him too much, his struggles for personal transformation will be a lot easier on both of you.
Hello Captain- Thank you for your words of wisdom
Hi Captain, this is not so much a question about parent child compatability but I have recently had a bad breakup with a person I thought was my soulmate who disposed of me cruelly after saying some harsh words and telling me he had cheated very bluntly after I said I would give him some space. He was very cynical with me and sarcastic after he made a lot of promises and put a intelligent charming sweet image of himself. I think he was narcissist and analyzing his chart his birthday is 6-6-84 I found that his fourth house has mars conjuct saturn in scorpio in his 4th house as well as cancer in his 12th house. Could these tell of an emotional childhood he has been secretive about that could be a high cause of him being narcissist or is he just emotionally cold and cruel? Thank you for your input captain and sorry if this is not in the right topic. My bday is 9-25-1981 in love I am a very forgiving person and I even extended my hand out to him as a friend through a passionate yet friendly letter i wrote him. I have not heard from him however but I am finding it very difficult to move on since I haven't received adequate closure.
You and your mom: this is very difficult as a parent-child relationship. You may not always be very sympathetic to your mother's need for approval and recognition. You can sometimes be brutally honest, letting her know immediately when her behaviour doesn't cut the cake. Even when you were very young, you may have had standards of reasonable and constant behaviour that your mother may have found unattainable and hard to live up to. You two are often over-sensitive to eah other, and bickering and sarcasm can be the result. You should both try to be more respectful of each other and not hold back your love. The challenge here is to be sensitive to each other's needs more than your own. Insensitivity and selfishness can arouse tremendous conflict and at times can threaten to tear the relationship apart. Any sort of critical and rejecting attitudes on your part are likely to bring out resentment and antagonism in your mother. In turn you may be put off by her penchant for expressing her emotions publicly and by her lack of sensitivity to your need for privacy and discretion. Great care must be taken then to sense the other person's point of view and to treat it with respect. This relationship rarely gives itself entirely to emotion, tending to hold back and guard its vulnerabilities. Tremendous restlessness can be someting of a stumbling block for your mother since this makes it difficult for her to access the creativity and innovation that is part of her destiny. She is verbally gifted but can be touchy when it comes to others' input or opinions, and she may become quite alienated if her ideas are not met with the recognition and appreciation she feels she deserves. She may also manifest her natural uniqueness in a kind of meglomania, refusing to admit her mistakes or accept the rejections that are the price for being different. Cultivating real self-confidence will be an issue for her here as will learning how to tap into her considerable intuition. Your mother will find that her highest creative expression is manifested only when she learns the superiority of silence to speech and of peace to the excitement of battle. When she can centre her conflicting energies and develop grace of movement, she will finally find the approval from others (and herself) that she craves.
You and your father: this is also worst for a familial relationship. It can be supportive and understanding, but intense. It demands that both father and daughter work to win each other's respect, and the road to this goal can be rough indeed. Tensions and problems between you however can have the positive effect of stimulating you both to ever higher levels of achievement. The emotional levels you reach with each other can be so powerful that it may not be possible for either of you to remain objective yet later on, you Sharon may be able to assess the state of the relationship. You may keep your findings to yourself however, realising that your father will have no interest in your analysis. Power conflicts abound here - your father has a need to be infallible and might try to force you into a subservient role that you will find difficult to accept. Competition and stress are to be expected here. You two do recognise each other's talents but you tend to also be each other's best critics. Together you two could be a powerful force in the outside world but with each other you can be very combative. Coming to terms with the need for consistency in his consideration of others may prove to be a struggle for your father in his lifetime. He does possess the capacity to take others into account; it's just that his attention is easily sidetracked by his own grand schemes. His life lesson is to learn to place others in positions of equality to himself. A rugged individualist, he may also do a fair share of wrestling with issues of commitment versus freedom, and caring versus control. This rather heroic man may do a great deal of soul-searching in the process of discovering just what it is that others expect of him, for he is possessed of such a degree of confidence that he is often quite bewildered when things don't go according to his plans. Yet if he exalts his more thoughtful side and turns inward in a search for greater enlightenment, he is sure to find the answers necessary to enjoy a fruitful and expansive life journey. He will find his greatest fulfillment in engaging in activities of a more universal consequence for humanity.
LibraLoveGirl this is the right forum for your question -
Thank you Captain
For my mother and me, who I live with still- that was really informative and true. For my father and me, I no longer have contact with. He pretty much disowned the whole family when he divorced my mom. They say you choose your parents before your born, what was I thinking????? LOL
You and your Gemini son 1997: this relationship can be tricky. You can be a potent influence in your son's life but the crucial question is whether your influence is entirely beneficial - as such a proud and powerful personality, you are not invariably a satisfactory role model. It is also questionable whether your flighty son can give you the unwavering attention and recognition you crave. He can provide the patience and understanding you require but his head will be filled with so many distracting things to do and think about that you may feel neglected. You must learn to pull back your urge to control and just go with the flow with him (and with everyone). Still, if his expansive vision and motivating ability can meld with your leadership skills, you two can be a positive force for change as champions of the downtrodden in matters of equality, denouncing exclusion or privilege. Kindness, affection, and sympathy are likely between you and your son here. Innovative and idealistic like yourself, he will have a sound business sense that is likely to keep any shared projects with you on the rails. The relationship is usually optimistic, but you must both be careful neither to avoid self-criticism nor to dismiss the valuable suggestions of others as unwanted negativity. Your son is gifted with a fine sense of adventure and a measure of faith, but he may have a problem putting down roots on his life journey. His fertile imagination and visionary ability may see him flit from one interest to the next instead of working to fulfill the potential of just one. He may discover that the practical application of his talents is neither entirely beyond his reach, nor entirely to his liking. Yet he can find happiness, providing he allows himself ample mental free time and the personal space to explore his ideas and dream his dreams apart from the demands of daily life. He has a strong yearning for experience and, once he comes to terms with the fact that the ability to bring inspiration to manifestation is essentially derived from experience and observation, he will doubtless find the right balance between adventure and perseverence. He will need to find grounding activities and companions that can anchor him to the earth in order to help him achieve his dreams.
You and your Gemini son 1999: this child will have the same sort of relationship with you as the other son but because they were born in different years, their personalities will be a bit different. This son may become too attached to what others think. He must learn to stand up for what he believes and for those he loves, to set his resolve and make a commitment. Learning to deal with the situations and circumstances that will confront him, rather than striking out in ever-changing directions, will be his life's challenge. Prone to pushing the limits of his experience, he may prefer to switch sides rather than fight and may be too chameleon-like for his own good. He mustn't pretend that running is seeking. He will also need to overcome his restlessness and a certain cynicism before he can be truly successful. Yet he has a fine flair for objective evaluation and is willing to take the risks associated with standing up for his principles. If he can manage to find the focus, strength, and wisdom to complement his versatility, intelligence, and optimism, then he will discover amazing opportunities for the kind of expansion that comes with a commitment to spiritual awareness, identity, and growth. By staying grounded in his intimate relationships. he will find much fulfillment.
You and your mom: you two can each get lost in your own little world of fantasy, escaping there when real life gets too tough. It's a protective mechanism against unkind or misunderstanding attitudes. But this relationship can leave a lot to be desired in the personal realm where it tends to make you both hypersensitive and, since you are both already highly critical types, this can amount to a large prescription for pain. You Calixia are extremely sensitive to criticism and your mom will target this Achilles' Heel of yours when she is challenged or hurt. You are both demanding of each other, a trait that can be constructive in a professional sphere where it can urge you on to deliver your personal best, but it will put a lot of stress on a less structured personal relationship. A tendency to go off the deep end is undeniable here.You two may even compete with each other, trying to beat the other to whatever you both desire, which can cause many hurt feelings especially if it started in your adolesence. Your mother will have suffered from a refusal to put down roots for a great part of her life. She has a compelling, charismatic personality but she will doubtless have to work to control a rather temperamental streak and learn to practice what she preaches. Drama and criticism make up a good deal of her world. She needs to realise that spending all her time questioning everything means she will never produce anything. This would be a tragedy because she has much to contribute to the creation of beauty. Wonderfully artistic, she may nevertheless manifest some snobbish or prima donna tendencies and may have an unrealistic vision of her talents as well. Life will prove her greatest teacher. If she immerses herself in the experience of living, she will come to know which paths to choose since her strengths, opportunities, and preferences are sure to become clearer. Once she gets out of her head and into the world, she will find there is much out there to her liking.
would appreciate it if you done one for me
Thank you Captain. That was amazing. And lovely.
You and your daughter: a parent-child relationship here can be loving but disillusioned and unforgiving, particularly if one of the two should fall from grace in the eyes of the other. Both of you expect the promises you make to one another to be kept, and hold each other strictly to their word. You must learn to become more objective of each other and more respectful of each other's strengths and weaknesses. Your relationship is usually grounded in the here and now. It often focuses on cold hard facts and demands that the literal truth be told. Honesty is obligatory here, and woe to the parent or child who breaks this unspoken agreement. This relationship produces strong practical thinking and also sensuousness and attractiveness. But your life together can be painful if you two don't see eye-to-eye. Provocation and combat can occur in very short duration. As formidable as your child is, she is no match for you in a knock-down, drag-out psychological confrontation - you know exactly how to wound her through her pride by undermining her confidence, but you must restrain yourself from doing so. It would be better if you do not respond to her provocations and either walk away from her dramas or sail through them calmly and quietly. You must teach her to subdue and tame her emotions. If she sees she can get to you or get her way, her confrontations will increase. Your daughter has a tendency to be attracted to the wild side of life. Her life challenge is to become centred in and content with who she is, evolving gracefully to take on a mantle of quiet authority. She will become a leader not by rule, but by example. For that to happen, she must gain more self-control of her passions and develop the qualities that will engender respect - trustworthiness, sound judgment, resourcefulness, and calm under pressure. Though she is capable of rising to almost any challenge, she will have to face down some personal demons before she can experience any success and recognition. She may resist the challenge of developing a greater degree of sophistication and charm, believing such efforts to be pretentious or unnecessary, or else she may choose to exercise her influence in a narrow sphere or content herself with being 'a big fish in a little pond' to the detriment of her higher development and greater potential. Fiercely loyal, she must also avoid a tendency to be rather masochistic or to tie herself to overdependent or unworthy associates out of a misguided sense of fidelity. She may convince herself that it would be a crime not to let a relationship run its course, but not having a relationship is far better than being in an unhealthy one. She must allow herself to be truly loved once in a while. She is very intuitive and psychic - for others, but when it comes to herself and those she hangs with, she can be quite 'blind'. Nonetheless, her chances of success are considerable and with time, training, and a willingness to relinquish her stubbornness, your daughter can flourish on her life's journey.
You rock! I now understand a lot more about my family. Thanks for taking the time and the effort for your post. I loved it and I can have the patience I needed for my children to shine. Blessings.
thank you captain...You said a mouthful and was right on key with alot of how our relationship has been.. Thank you again.
Me: 3/03/1990, 12:50am
Father: 1/13/1959, 1:20pm
I know the way growing up with them was and I understand the general clashing/mixing of all our traits in regards to astrology... But the more I try to learn the more I feel fulfilled!
Thanks, Captain :]
You and your father: you two may often take the lead in planning the family's activities, and you can also represent the family when social obligations must be fulfilled. This relationship has a decidedly philosophical leaning and you two do best in areas that require theorizing, planning, reorganization and preparation. This relationship usually centres around providing effective leadership. Your father would seem to be the boss here, since you are rarely either capable of or even interested in dominating your powerful parent. But things are not as they appear in this respect: although you cannot govern your dad, you generally demand to be on an equal footing with him in terms of power and control. It is often your relationship itself that assumes a leadership role in your immediate social or familial circle. However since this relationship carries the possiblity of passionate involvement, ironing out these issues may prove far from easy. Emotional control can be lost and power abused if you are both not careful. Keep your feet on the ground and don't get lost in theorizing. Your father can suffer from a need for vanity and ego affirmation that he perhaps will lose as he gets older. Yet his self-sacrificing and generous attitudes will be of tremendous help to him as long as he doesn't take them too far. In the social sphere, he will be faced with the challenge of learning when and to whom he must say no. Also his tendency to take himself too seriously can impair his empathy for others and he may occasionally collapse into bouts of self-pity and hopelessness. Your dad will benefit greatly from cultivating his social contacts and skills, and his ability to share with others on a personal level will in turn nurture his capacity to share with the world. His great thoughtfulness, fine analytic ability and wonderful sense of humour will no doubt make him a popular and admired figure, providing he checks on his closer intimate relationships to evaluate whether there is any codependency. His fulfillment in life will come from a boost in self-confidence when others turn to him for his caring advice.
You and your brother: a service-oriented approach is usually seen in family members of this combination. You two tend to make your energies available to any family member in need of assistance. Warm and caring attitudes should prevail between you. You both show great sympathy for each other's needs and for those of others and can be highly effective in giving counselling or support. However, although you both are aware of what each other needs, you are not always sure of what you yourselves want. The result is that you both have difficulty making strong, sensible decisions and definite choices. There is also a certain lack of passion in this relationship and it can become a little bland. Neither of you has a lot of objections to most of your shared activities, but neither have you much desire for them, either. You can live together in quite a satisfied state for years without ever really making strong demands on each other or on the relationship. Although happiness should never be sneered at, in this case there is often a feeling that something is missing from the relationship. Your brother has a deep need to be self-protective that might get in the way of relating to others well. His principal task will be to learn to set aside his need to be accepted and to reach for a more authentic sense of life and love. He can suffer from a certain degree of emotional immaturity and must open to his deeper side and its wisdom, no matter what it tells him. He is often hesitant to 'rock the boat', especially if doing so might affect his sense of personal security. Yet he has great creative gifts and talents that will demand to be shared, and his impulse towards self-expression will be sure at some point to outweigh his need for self-protection. Once he opens himself to the idea of more profound relationships, he will find that his truest calling is not to be merely liked, but loved. He must look for the miracles and enchantment in everyday life rather than always be in his head.
Thank you, Captain!
My daughters is 5/17/09
Hotvirgorising, a wildness can manifest here, reinforcing your shared freedom-loving, eccentric sides.Since this relationship focuses on independence, however, the resulting lack of stability or security is not necessarily bad for it. Furthermore, although this combination can certainly encourage in you both a desire to overthrow tradition or to fight more sober thinking or behaviour, it isn't really as destabilizing as it can seem. You two are quite capable of settling down to work within the system or family unit if you want to, and the revolutionary temperament you encourage in each other may be mainly a form of play or creativity that, if given an outlet, can leave you quite sedate and happy. You both value groundbreaking and unconventional attitudes and are likely to develop unusual forms of communication, featuring creative forms of language. An undemanding friendship would work best here but as a parent and child matchup there is more likely to be a breakdown in communication due to the relationship being less free than it should be. Try not to expect too much but instead learn from from each other and pursue common goals
Your daughter will tend towards a desire to escape which must be curbed. She may be in for a rather wild ride in life as she is gifted with charisma and brilliance and some truly formidable instincts and intuitions. However, she can dissipate those qualities by giving in to mood swings, overemotionalism, and irresponsibility until she learns to calm down a bit and focus her energy. One way or another, she will be revolutionary rather than innovative in her outlook and will experience any number of problems with authority and limitations, real or imagined, to her freedom. She is a wild child whose mission in life will be to generate new ideas and thinking with her excitement and enthusiasm. She will apply her talent for embodying unusual ideas for the betterment of the lives of others. But she will have to retreat to nature once in a while for grounding of that electric energy of hers. When she learns to tap into the things that are common to human experience and comes to understand the value of long-term and even visionary goals, she will make even the most difficult and daunting tasks look easy. And that may be her greatest inspiration to us all. Your daughter will always make her influence felt. With her gift for sensing the newest trends, she has come to be a stirrer, a catalyst for new ideas, a mover and shaker.
Wow !!!!!!!!! Captain your great thanks so much for that detailed reply its greatly appreciated !
Captain, if you are still taking on readings I would love to have one for my family.
Son # 1: 08/19/2004
Son #2: 10/23/2006
Thanks in advance ! And if you are completely wiped out... not a problem at all.