Hanswolfgang need your insight if you can help!



  • so I have been reading your posts and I would really like some insight from you. I have been struggling this in my mind and really need to figure out what I really want. So I met this guy in april and things were going well but now i dont see where it is going to anymore. I know from the start that he is not a serious type of person but I took the chance. I had fun when ever I get to spend time with him, hence we dont see eachother much. Lately he has been telling me that he want me to go out and find a guy that will be loyal to me. He says he is a bad boy and that I am sweet girl and I deserve better. Also he has been telling me that he is getting old and want to get marry. But then he will ask if I will get mad at him if he does and will it hurts me. Im just really confused and dont know if i really should just pull myself out of this situation. I have to be honest that when he said go out and find a loyal guy and him getting marry does hurt me. But I just cant pull myself out from this situation. At this point I am still stuck with it and really need a clear vision of what is best for me (althought i know the best is probably leave him) My mind and my heart is not letting me to do so. if you can give me some opinion I will really appreciate



  • anothercancermenproblem,

    I would really like some insight from you: you are in a heart to heart relation with him.

    I really need to figure out what I really want: you want to constantly win, but you are the loser.

    I dont know if i really should just pull myself out of this situation: no.

    I really need a clear vision of what is best for me: drop your emotional attachments.

    if you can give me some opinion I will really appreciate: emotional disillusionment follows your highest aspiration.

    Once you start feeling, and that does mean feeling with your heart, not just being emotional, you start feeling that you

    are so much in tune with existence that even to hurt a

    small leaf on a tree is unimaginable. One cannot hurt

    anything -- and the whole society depends on violence.

    It depends on violence, on hurting, on creating

    suffering for people, on torture. The whole society is

    violent, so the heart has been bypassed, and by and by

    a shortcut has been made by schools, colleges,

    universities. Their whole function is to connect your

    energy to the head, and not to allow it to move towards

    the heart. They prevent the movement of energy in every

    way from going towards the heart. Then a person is

    efficient, but dead. He is a robot -- mechanically

    perfect -- humanly absurd, meaningless.



  • Hi hanswolfgang,

    you brought up something I never thought about seperating feeling and emotion. I think my emotion rules everything right now. and I really should start feeling from my heart and see what it tells me. Hopefully this will be able to help me and direct me to the right path.



  • anothercancermenproblem,

    I celebrate myself, and I hope soon the day will come

    you will be celebrating yourself. And when thousands

    and thousands of people around the earth are

    celebrating, singing, dancing, ecstatic, drunk with the

    divine, there is no possibility of any global suicide.

    With such festivity and with such laughter, with such

    sanity and health, with such naturalness and

    spontaneity, how can there be a war?



  • thanks for the advice. I think with who I am at the moment is because I just got laidoff and feel lost. I have always work work work and now i got to sit at home I felt I do not have a purpose. I do not know what my hobby is anymore or if i even have one. Also, i think maybe im using this guy as a comfort blanket?



  • anothercancermenproblem,

    maybe im using this guy as a comfort blanket? yes.

    Intelligence is a mastery -- mastery of all the

    mechanisms within you. The body is a mechanism, the

    mind is a mechanism: you become the master. Nobody is

    manipulating you; the mind simply receives your orders.

    This is intelligence.



  • so if im using this guy as a comfort blanket why will you suggest not to pull myselt out of the situation with him? maybe that might help me to find my path?



  • anothercancermenproblem,

    why will you suggest not to pull myselt out of the situation with him? because you are invited, follow the invitation.

    maybe that might help me to find my path? no.

    Life is a miracle, the songs of the birds are

    miracles, the flowers with so many colors... This whole

    existence, if your inner being is awake, becomes an

    unending series of mysteries.



  • Hi hanswolfgang,

    I think I have wake up a little bit. Im trying to concentrate on myself more rather then him.

    Just need to regather myself



  • anothercancermenproblem,

    good, because if this becomes a pattern of thinking in your life – as it has become – that the fault is always with the other, then your own life will remain untransformed. Then how can there be any transformation, any revolution? It is not a question of whether the other person is right or wrong. If your attention is constantly focused on yourself, then slowly, slowly you will change and a new life will begin within you.



  • Hanswolfgang,

    although I say I want to concentrate on myself more but my mind is still thinking of him most of the time. "HE" is still ruling my thoughts.

    am I attached to this person? I realy wonder



  • anothercancermenproblem,

    am I attached to this person? no.

    But in this person you glimpsed the divine for the very first time.


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