Aquarian Female, Scorpio Male
Im an Aqua and my Scorpio just dumped me out of the blue after more than a year... no explanations, no goodbye. He has Always ran hot and cold towards me, or so I felt... He always said it was to keep my interest peaked. He was intense, and very passionate... I'd never known I could feel so alive, or love so deeply until I met him. He seemed to get a thrill out of playing mind games with me. -I'm a pretty typical Aqua in that I base almost everything from a logical standpoint and he said more than once he loved to mess with my head. I fell into a pattern of playing along with his games, it was painful and yet intensely pleasurable and exhilarating.
It got to a point where I told him if it was ever more than a mind game, or one of his tests to prove I loved him... That he just needed to tell me in a direct manner that he was through and no longer interested.
Everyone knows Scorps are moody and go between intensely withdrawn and outgoing behavior... I spent the better part of the last year trying to figure out the game and play by the rules. Apparently, and Scorps, I'd love an answer lol... their are no set rules? They change on the fly??
So, we got into a habit... he would want to be intensly close, then pull away and turn cold and distant... I got in the habit of pursuing him when he did that... he would come back and we would both get uh, rather intense with each other... then same thing over again.... over and over...
I wish I knew this last time around if he was just playing another game, or if he really is finished. Im still in love with him, although Im a bit afraid of him now, so much pain in the last few months... We've spoken and "hung out" twice since he summarily "dumped" me back in July. He lives a distance away and has the whole time, but we made it work. Around the time he dumped me, his young adult niece had just moved in with him (yes it's really his niece lol, met her and her mom before ) He also has had a roomate since mid spring. I don't know if I've literally been replaced in his immediate attentions, if I should wait, or totally give up on him. I'm not one to fall easily in love so Im not in a big hurry to replace him...
SO please, any, and I do mean ANY insight is not only welcome but needed.
His bday 11/17/63
This relationship often works better as a friendship or working partnership than a love match. Emotionally you two can be very close. Speech and thought are rarely the focus here; you two are far more likely to concentrate on feelings, empathy and sympathy. You may even have a psychic connection which you may discuss or simply experience. The relationship's goals, often realised, are likely to be emotional openness and honesty. Its sensitivity can also extend to the projects that you develop together and that often bear your stamp; the results of these undertakings are apt to be refined and creative in nature. When you two are working on such a project, the close psychic bond between you usually allows you to complete the work, even if you are separated in space and time, for you each can act with full assurance that your partner would approve of your decisions.
Although sympathetic, a love affair here can be somewhat difficult and intense. Your unusual degree of sensitivity to each other is certainly a strength, yet it can also manifest as irritation and emotional overreaction. Your psyche, Aquarian2U, often summons up projections of its own shadow side and falls in love with them, so that your friend may willy-nilly find himself playing out an unconscious role for you. Of course, the attention is gratifying for him but he will want to be loved for himself, rather than just the image he is unwittingly supplying of someone or something else. A commitment to psychological investigation will usually allow you two to begin unravelling the complexities of your relationship. Marriage may let you mature even more - here you can really begin to self-actualise. Or it can tear you both apart if you continue with hypersensitive, projecting and immature attitudes. Toughen up and don't let your buttons get pushed so easily. Strive for self-understanding and use reason as well.
Friendship here can be much easier because it doesn't have the overwhelming emotions and passion of a love affair, but rather an easy flow of sympathetic vibrations. Your friend is powerful in giving direction and you can provide a relaxed and easy atmosphere in which to work, if you share the same workplace or career. As friends, you two may well go into business together, usually with few regrets, as long as you keep it from getting too intimate and personal.
I've been wondering about the same connection - female aquarian, male scorpio. conventional wisdom (including advice from loved ones) tells me to walk away from this now, detached man. But my intuition and psychic connection with him told me that a) he would step away for quite some time; and b) his detachment has nothing to do with his regard for me.
Although he may be too immature to reflect the kind of empathy that most come to expect from friends/lovers; I feel this is an opportunity for me to learn to receive love from people without judgment or fear. The verdict is out on whether or not I can let him in too close - but the world of connections between people is not black and white. Nor is it really for anyone but those directly involved to know whether or not it is right or wrong. This is the conclusion I've come to for now for myself.
If you find yourself in a game of cat and mouse, and in an intense amount of pain as a result; that is likely to teach you a great deal. Suffering is something we learn from; but only when we have the courage release it, and face the unknown. Sounds like you are on your path to strength and authenticity with yourself again Aquarian2U.
All the best - and fear not, friend!