Is my Cancer Male Mental??



  • This post is kind of disturbing....but if you all know the abuse I have put up with this guy, this was my last straw....I am finally starting to realize there is something not right upstairs.......I want everyone to know...we are both adults here...we are in our late 30's and I feel like he should be diapers...

    So I text him..."hope your having a good day"...I get back this twisted demented text..."Oh boy I got 5 crazy b*&#$ES texting me right now...you all must think alike"...I responded "what?" he responded "I have 5 girls textin' they are all crazy"....I didnt want to "react" and show that it bothered me...so I handled it like an adult..(plus the jerk just basically called me crazy)..."I said sorry to hear that, I will free up some text space for ya...hope it all works out...." HERE COMES THE SICK AND REALLY DEMENTED PART....he texted me and said "yeah I banged you all"....I respond keeping my cool..."your disgusting...like I really needed to hear that"....EVEN MORE GROSS...he said "yes and you tasted each one of them"....I was so offended and turned off...I did not respond to that at all....so the genious that he thinks he is...text me about 20 minutes later...(because I did not respond and wasnt going to)...."now go away and leave me alone"...I thinking like dude, I was even going to text you....he felt the need to make it look like he tossed me with that text...but quite honestly he made himself look like a scumbag and was not impressed....has anyone been with a bi-polar??? he seriously needs a psyschiatrist.....needless to say...you will be proud of me...I went online paid the $7.00 a month...and blocked his psychiotic @@@.....Any thoughts on this crazy cancer??? I am so done...



  • WHOA...

    First off, what a dbag! Secondly run far and fast....

    Check out this site.... and yes, he is mental, and selfish, and sounds just like the guys on this site...

    http://www.vainencounters.com/index.php?q=forum/2009/10/21/traits-narcissists



  • Wow, yeah... stay away from that guy... what a whack job!



  • WOW...I just read that article..most of these numbers on this article he has done...especially these ones.....him to a "T".....yeah I am running....

    9. When they find other better fresher supplies of attention...you will become non-existant, until they may need you again one day when they may just rear their heads again and try and suck you back in.

    10. They will be nice as pie to your face and turn around and tell the next person they see that you mean nothing to them.

    11. They are master manipulators and use any information they have on you to control you and get them what they want.

    12. Their emotions are shallow and have no meaning and everyone in their lives are nothing but a source of attention.

    13. They say things that are so out there that you think they are from another planet.

    Oh boy....what did I get myself into....I have to just let it go....even tho he is not worth the $7.00 I used to block him....the $7.00 is worth my sanity....thanks for commenting....this was such a ridiculous text he sent I am still in awww....



  • He is a sadistic, mean spirited, narcissitic man who does not deserve even the smallest fraction of your time. Leave this douche, and his wounded heart, to self pity and despair because that is exactly what he deserves.



  • Thanks all...It really helps that I found this forum...it really helps to have others perspective on things...otherwise I am always questioning myself....and your right he doesn't deserve a minute of my time....I think with his attitude he will be single forever....I am embarrassed too...in his late 30's still living with his daddy....gosh this was the wakeup call I needed....thanks for your encouragement....



  • Cancer men are very confusing creatures and play games...

    Most of us that have been with one can understand your falling for him...

    What's the saying... Better to have loved and lost than to have wasted anymore time with a psycho...

    lol, take care of yourself.



  • I have almost the same experienced with you, his accusing me a slut, bitch,psycho, liar and I make man sick its was really hurting my feelings , I done nothing wrong to him and it's totally unacceptable he knows I'm a bit conservative and now his accusing me this kinds of bad words. I felt so humiliate and cried when I hear that to him over the phone and his always like that if he want to hurt me always over the phone. I never hear this kinds of things to my past relationship. But if were together he hates to open and work it out and it's killing me and I felt so idiot to myself and , I don't deserved this kind of attitude. He told me to leave him alone . I am Aquarian were just dating but I'm attracted to him so I can easily trust him and give my everything cos he want it to take it slow and let see how we go. I never done this before I find it weird but I do really like him. Exgirlfriend or girlfriend I had no idea which one is the truth. The girl email me and she said he still having a relationship with him but I never reply to her email. I find myself guilty and I felt bad cos if , I only knew I wouldn't trust him easily.And when he visit me at my place I try to open it up to him but guest what he doesn't wanna talk about it .I feel like I'm used here and I have nothing to do but to leave him a long and that's all he want.And with all my hearts I will cos I really don't need this kind of dramas though it hurting me cos I still care to him. I told him he really need to be alone and to think sometimes then I was so shocked ,When he said to me that I ruined his life and he have had sick of people like me hurting his feelings. I said to him that accusation is so heavy to hear and I never done anything to him for all I know I care about him. I asked him a question if he care for me and again he said Lol are you kidding me after you ruin my life you asked me that . And I said to him okey fair enough I will leave you alone cos I already hear want to hear from you, And this is not I want to live my life to be. And he answer no you have no go.. so I move on and start all over again.But it bothers me a lot after a few days. I'm still asking for explanation and he can't explained instead he said to me to fuck off and leave him alone. I know, I'm annoying but I always seek the truth and always leave things clear.Poor thing to me all my life no one treated me like this..I am mad at myself cos I allow him to abused me and humiliate me cos I cut myself short for the first time and I don't deserved this



  • well...annilan...my crazy cancer really torn my heart out and stepped on it....I really couldnt stand the name callin...i would get the *** off all the time like you....but you know what after this last act he pulled with "the sick text", I am done....he is not happy until he makes me miserable, hurts me or degrades me.....he will stay single for the rest of his life, because no one will put up with him...and I am realizing it now....they both are like "predators"...not happy until they capture you...eat you alive and turn your life upside down.....your guy sounds the same....I know mine will eventually regret what he said to me....he thinks he has the upper hand by saying what he said to me...to try and make me jeoulous or hurt me...but honestly he made himself out to be a male slut, scumbag and a player....no thanks I dont need that in my life....I will actually be the one to come out on top..because he just made a complete idiot out of himself...



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  • @tattoogemini - did you read my response to your last post? i was totally thinking that he has some mental issues!



  • Hey tattoo, I just went through 2 years of horror with a Scorp narcissist.

    He had hurt me so much. The greatest gift he ever gave me was one day he opened up and told me he had this problem. He told me that all along it was him... not me.

    It was at that point I should have ran... but I stayed because I was foolish enough to think that with enough time, caring, understanding he'd see that all I ever wanted was to love him.

    This last bite... ouch. It hurt so much.

    I had to block him out. All I can say is this-- they do not hurt you to hurt YOU. It's not personal. It may FEEL personal but it's not.

    They would do the same thing to ANYBODY in their way. They really were never shown love and don't know how to love.

    This is hard to digest as I have read what your guy said and all I can say is "Darn girl, been right there almost identical situation".

    Just believe me on this-- This scorp has ripped my heart out and stommped on it. I used to take it personal-- I don't anymore.

    Now? I just look at him and understand-- this is who he is. He will never change, not until he's much older as they say this wears down in a person's 40's -50's NOT ALL THE TIME but it does wear down as they do not have the money, looks whatever they are using to get their attention.

    I do 100% believe this as the scorp I am speaking of? He's in his 40's. So, all this means so far is he knows he has an issue. Still not ready to fix it. ...lol... maybe in 8 or 10 more years ..lol..

    One day--- many, many years down the road (depending on how old he is) he will rememeber this and you-- and how he made you feel-- and he will regret it (if he does not already).

    *Just know that he's like a drug addict.He has a problem

    Try and understand that he never got love as a little boy and now seeks it any way he can. I bet his childhood was very lonely or very cruel. Because of this he will grow old and be alone. He'll never get that love that he's always wanted. His hurts are so deep that he will carry him all his life.

    If you can try and find some sad comfort in this-- just know that I'd bet no matter how much he hurt you-- it probably can never come close to the hurt he suffered as a little boy and will suffer as an adult.

    He's empty of love-- the one thing he wants more than anything-- and wont let himself have love-- because deep inside he does not think he deserves it.

    My advice? Give your heart time to heal and then send him off a note. Forgive him-- it will help you.

    He may try and snag you back but DO NOT GO BACK HE IS NOT BETTER (unless his therapist says so ..lol..) in the note tell him you will be there if one day he finds himself alone and needs a friend.

    AGAIN-- DO NOT GET SNAGGED BACK IN-- be kind from a distance because if not-- HE WILL STILL HURT YOU HE IS NOT BETTER!

    You may never hear from him again.... you may be told to go f-yourself. It's ok, either way-- this is for you-- not him.

    He really does not mean to be a d!(k. He acts like a d!(k ...lol... trust me, just called the scorp I'm dealing with one today ..lol..

    BUT I know and understand that he doesn't mean it to hurt me. He'll eventually do it to ANYBODY in his path. Everybody says how horrible they are-- and they are all right-- but they really do have a problem. It's not fake-- they are broken toys stuck on the Land Of Misfit Toys. They're all alone in they're life. It's sad actually.

    I do forget this sometimes and occationally I do get snagged in-- but I am much better avoiding the snaggs... with LOTS of distance and mindful help ..lol..

    I've accepted that he'll never be "my guy" and I'll be honest it hurts as I wanted it to be hm more than anything ..lol.. believe me.

    But you see, being a survivor of severe childhood abuse-- I understand and I accept him-- for him. I know how sometimes people can emotionally "shut down".

    The best thing you can do is either walk away and forgive him

    (he really does not mean it. He has the emotions of a little child in a mans body-- mind and body of a man-- heart of a 3 year old. Ever try and reason with a 3 year old ..lol.. good luck)

    OR

    Try and know him from a distance-- it's hard-- I get snagged ALL THE TIME ..lol.. but if you get a freind or somebody to read up on narcissim and they'll help pull you out and remind you when you get snagged..lol.. you'll be ok.

    He really will be all alone for all his life.

    Tattoo- trust me, if he is a narcissist then he's had a very horrible life-- it's turned him into a horrible person-- and he will grow old and be a sad and lonely man.

    When he's finally ready to open his heart and give "something" the reward you'll get in your heart will be amazing... not because you finally got "something" from him--- because you'll know that you really helped somebody that everybody else in the world has given up on.

    ..lol.. too bad it'll be when he's 50 or 60 ..lol..

    PS

    I know this from personal experience. The scorp has only opened up deep to me three times. He was honest and scared. I actually feel special that I was one of the few-- if the only person he let "see" inside him.

    Don't get me wrong he's still a D!(K ...lol... BIG TIME ..lol..

    But to me? Ahhhh, what can I say.... as long as I don't get sucked in--

    and if when I do-- like this past week ..lol.. again...

    I get pulled out (thanks kel big smooches)

    He'll NEVER be my guy and your crab WILL NEVER BE YOUR GUY not even when he's 50 or 60.

    Just understand this. This is NOT romantic advice-- this is human being advice.

    I'm able to look at the scorp I know like the scruffy little runt on the block that nobody cares about, he's the kid in school who never has lunch or lunch money, the one who's always dirty. The little kid who's parents never get him presents on Christmas morning.

    That's how I'm able to understand and accept him.

    One more drop if I may? Ask Leoscorp to do a reading for you. (you will have to start a thread for her something like "Need help from LeoScorp" or something similiar) Ask her to read your thread. It may take her a few days... so put a post here and there on your thread so it stays current and she sees it.

    She is a VERY special and insightful person.

    I hope you feel better soon one day.



  • One more last thing tattoo- for a man or woman to become a narcissit they were more than likely:

    ignored

    OR

    told how they will never be good enough, smart enough, handsome enough while being compaired to a sibling/relative/neighbor's kid

    OR

    Told they were the super best at everything made out to be some sick parents fake super boy and got out to the real world and realized that they were never prepared for "real" life and can't cope because like you and I were never taught how to.

    OR

    Were so physically or $e%ually abused they took the real person and locked them away. Made themselves become a fake person who does not get hurt.

    No matter what it is-- it's sad actually. To be a little child and never be told you're good enough, or have somebody say "nice job son I'm proud of you" or a Mother who says "I love you no matter what because you're my child"

    If you grew up like this-- you might be broken too.

    Take this as a lesson he has taught you-- a gift from him. My experience has turned me into a very mindful parent and person. I was before ..lol.. but now I pay super extra attention to what I say to my kids.

    Ok, off the soap box ...lol... out the door for dinner!

    G'night.



  • Hi! Tattoogem, I complete understand how you feel this is the first time, I'm dealing with the Cancer man I usually end up in good separated ways when it comes to love relationship and no one in my past done this to me. I'm very friendly and sweet to anyone. It's really hard and too painful to treat us like this.I thought he was the one at first he used to be nice and always pleasing me. I was surprised when he noticed some of my past and a few pictures with my friends . I guess his a jealous person and so insecure.I'm not trying to be mean here cos comparison its not a good things to do,but Honestly his so way on my past relationship and life style and the way we respected each other and till now I can tell that they value me as a good friend.But this cancer man made me feel so insecure to myself and finally realized this is so wrong no good for me .I get hurt but I feel sorry for him I can see his loneliness in the world. I don't really know if anyone can handle this kind of attitude manipulative, very selfish attitude, and jealousy factor.He can easily turn the story and if you start to compromised with cancer they never listen and its always his way otherwise he put the blame on me . I'm physically mentally drain to his mind game. And the worse was he keep swearing on my family behind their back. and he hated us for doing that.which is me and my family are so close to each other auntie, uncle everyone. How is that and threat me that his going to kill my love ones, At first I'm so scared at him but cos I know some how he had a good heart. I send him message that what ever he said to me was totally lie and I need an explanation. He said to me just to leave him alone. I said fine but I am always here for him as a good friend and ready to listen to him when he need someone.But I never ever get back to him again.This very alarming to anyone cos they have slip personality and very moody in one snap he can easily change, easily be hot and cold appearance very crazy and cruel relationship. I wish him well and all the best of everything. I won't he doesn't want to hear and seeing me again . And thats fine He better get out of my way otherwise.I won;t allow him to call different names.



  • moonbeauty...your thread was very informative....your right....as much as I hate him right now...I know I would be there for him if he needed me...I would for anyone....its just me....I dont think that I could send him a note or line...because it just would turn into "go **** yourself, your the problem not me...a self denial thing...he is not happy unless he puts me down...I forgive him in my heart...but making contact with him will just upset me.....I remain to keep his texts, calls blocked....its the best way for me to heal right now....he will be miserable for the rest of his life...I know this...he opened up to me a few times...said his ex girlfriend hurt him really bad....I feel he needs therapy for this....he actually told me he will "never allow himself to get that hurt again"...well if you dont open your heart...you will never feel love...and he wont...all women are objects to him...I cant deal with his self pitty even tho I love him...but enough is enough...I dont deserve this and I know this...I dont know about his childhood but I am sure he treats his mom the same way....hopefully someday he will realize what a cold, abusive person he was....I gotta let him be someone else's problem...I just cant deal with it anymore....he said all of those things to hurt me...play games....my god...I am in my late 30's...I need to move on...but thanks tho...you opened my eyes....much love to you all...your opinions have helped me alot...I love you guys...



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  • Awwww... thanks. I'm glad I was a help to you. I also am in my late 30's (errr.... ehm... very late ..lol..). If blocking him right now is what you have to do... so be it. I have the scorp blocked on my email so I completely understand ..lol..

    Like I said... I'm here for him, at a distance... lol.. very distanced. VERY LIMITED CONTACT ..lol..

    Now? I dunno, I'm healing from the whole experience finally meeting new people and having fun again.

    That's why I have to keep him at a distance. He can distroy a person's self esteem in 5 seconds flat! (at least he can do it to mine anyway) ..lol..

    Read this if you want-- it made me feel SOOOOO much better.

    http://samvak.tripod.com/narcissistgetbetter.html

    This website is chock full of info that can give you solid insight-- if you want it that is.

    But yeah, distance-- lots and lots of distance ..lol.. and don't worry, I do believe no matter what anybody says that deep down, they know they are wrong and appreciate those who still know them. Even from a distance.

    🙂

    Good Luck!



  • tattogemini & annielan,

    i think we're dealing with the same type of guy. He also likes to say: now go away and leave me alone. to feel as if he has control and toss you.

    He told me i'm crazy, i think he's crazy in another sense.

    I also told him that that whoever hurt him in the past really did hurt him. I would hope that one day he will open his heart to love again. Because this attitude doesnt get you anywhere in the end just alone at 40 ( as a example, showing that in the future) or sick.



  • Gemmi90...yes we sound like we are dealing with the same type of person here...i wrote this thread over a month ago...I have come a long way...it was a tortured relationship....I dont deserve it....and deserve better....we have had no contact...let some one else deal with him...i cant lick his wounds anymore...time to heal mine....hope all is well gemmi90