Gem30...& TheCaptain I need your opinion??
Since you and I are both gems...and I dated a Cancer...and your with a Cancer....I really used to not wear my heart on my sleeve...but with my Cancer male it was different....I always told him how I felt about him, that I missed him on a daily basis....we would have a great time together, he would go from nice to Mr. Nasty in a matter of minutes....with nothing even happing....the mood swings were tough for me...then it would turn into an argument, the name calling, he doesn't want me anymore...I would cry....then I wouldn't hear from him for days or weeks...and I would press the issue..why haven't you called or text....then I get the I don't want you...leave me alone...then I would leave him alone and he would come back...I don't get this...I care for him so much...the #$% was great...the physical attraction was undeniable....am I just pressing him to much when he wants time away...or do you think I was just used??...He tells me he cares about me...then the next day doesn't want anything to do with me...accuse me of "sleeping around" when he goes into shell...and I do nothing...I work, go home and go to bed....now I stupidly had a bad day on this past Saturday and text him that I missed him (he dismissed me begininng of Sept)....he responsed and said thank you...then he started with the mind games...that he was screwing some other woman right now...and my heart sank...but he wasn't he told me where he was at...just messin with my mind to hurt me....well I havent text since then...the desire is there...but he has not contacted me either....what's your opinion?? and what to do if he contact me??
"tattoogemini" I feel your pain, been there wih my cancer lol he still does that. Just texting him, if he texts you first then, just explain to him how you feel dont push it that he doesnt call u or text u. When cancers feel threatened they will contact you, and don't tell how u feel all the time lol this happened to me with my cancer he was crazy about me and soon as I told how I felt he disappeared for weeks. When they get to close to you they run, until they figure out what they want. They are insecure that's why probably he acuses you of sleeping around. They fear rejection lol big time and they hurt very easy. Don't give in to fast just leave him alone for now, he will bounce back for sure they always do as long as we let them. You have to stand up for yourself and, and know where you stand, he doesn't have to be rude and tell you straight that he doesnt want you, don't tolerate that. My cancer has never been with me like, if he tells me he doesnt want me I'm gone lol. Wait for a few days until he contancts you, resist and if doesnt contact you move on as sad as it sound now, trust me it will save you a lot of pain. Find someone who will respect you and care about. Keep me posted take care
add another gem to the pot with a cancer...last monday he told me he loved me. now, i get nothing. fanbloodytastic. exactly @gem30 - when they get close to you they run. they process and examine and feel and brood until they get their emotions in check. that's when they re-emerge and start the process all over again.
Cancer men have a dream of an ideal woman - a perfect wife, homemaker, and mother to both them and their children. The problem is no such paragon exists so they keep eternally chasing her, always feeling that the goddess is out there somewhere and that they shouldn't settle for 'mere mortals'.
As soon as Cancer man realises you don't measure up to his ideals, he's off on his eternal quest for perfection in a partner, never realising he is far from perfect as a mate himself. I'm not sure he will ever be truly happy while he has these unrealistic expectations. If you can put up with someone who says he loves you but always has one eye open for another woman, then this guy is for you...what Cancer men mean when they say they love you is "I love you for now - you'll do to fill my time until the real love of my life, Ms. Perfect, comes along." And as soon as someone resembling his ideals (like he thought you did) appears, he's off. You can either force him into therapy or move on to find someone who is less of a perfectionist.