Hi, I was born June 27, 1966, around 1;00p.m in Waterloo Iowa. My boyfriend says he has to "drag" me out of the house. Most of the time it's like pulling teeth. Right now I don't have my OWN place and I hate it. I tend to dwell on the past, which sucks because I've had a lot of bad things happen to me. Starting with a very insecure childhood, which makes my shell rockhard. People tell me that I'm very goodhearted. I have premonitions about bad things that are about to happen, but, I'm powerless to do anything about it. Even if I tried, I run the risk of a trip to a padded cell. I can amaze people by touching their hand and tell them details about their past. I don't know why I have this weird gift or what purpose it's for. When I drink I'm like Jeckle and Hyde. I'm a real a-hole. Lately, I've been a real b**** and I don't know why. The smallest things seem to set me off, and I just get so furious and I can't seem to control it. I can't stand a man who is touchy feelly, or men that cry.
Her's a recent excerpt from my diary. I drank a bottle of Vicks 44, it felt weird to be vertical, and as I layed there I started reminencing (not out loud) about after I graduated, things, people, and places. . . nouns I guess. Brown Printing, Dr. Suess, and how it all or how the hell I ended up where I'm at now. Without my children, without my family, without an education, without a job, without my goodlooks, without a phone, without a car, without a place of my own, broke, fat, living with an unemployed self-proclaimed legend of the embodiment of all seven deadly sins. Particularly sloth in every sense of the word. Thievery to a felonious extent, lacking any form of respect, morals, values, or priorities. But, an over abundance of pride, dignity, self-respect, vanity, pretentiousness, and that other word for love of oneself. Basement dwelling of his senior citizen mother whose making his brand new Suzuki payments. Woman beating coward. And most importantly without so much as a pill, or at the very least a f-ing beer! Then, suddenly remembering that the world is going to end in 2012 anyway. Monday, when waking up dead was not an option.
I was also born 27th June and can relate too what your saying. I tend too dwell on my past a bit too much, with an insecure childhood and a few bad relationships.
My life’s not ideal at the moment but am working towards a better future and I can get ratty when the changes don’t happen as fast as I would like.
I know a few Cancerians and we all seem to be going through some difficult times at the moment, I’m a single parent now and back at university. I feel that there will be a lot of major changes for the better for us Cancerians before the years out, and am sure you’ll be much happier when you get your own place and become more self sufficient as I will.
And hopefully you Cancers will end up with a great love.. perhaps and air sign.. a Gemini maybe? haha I'm just relating this back to my cancer love who's having a rough time with life stuff ( that are changes for the better!) but it's too much for us to see eachother right now.... plus venus is in retrograde til April! ACK!
Hi, Do you have a really bad case of cabin fever. I spent about 1/3 of my life about 500 miles N of you. That area has good schools (when I was there.) Make plans on how you are going to change this scenario. The sooner the better. You know, nothing is going to change until you do. I married and moved up there. The whole family was in the alcohol scenario. After 5 years, I left and went to college, granduated and returned home. So, I basically spent my 20's 1,300 miles from home. If I can do it, you can. That's my advice, try and get a career first. Let the rest fall in place after that.
Pepee is there a womans shelter you could go to if he is beating you they will take you in? That could be your first move to change your life. See a doctor for depression too. You are too negative and you really may need help to start loving yourself. Just put one foot in front of the other to change your life. Cancers really disect everything, chewing on it, thinking far too much. So if you can look at somethings and think sometimes oranges are just oranges and let the other stuff go it may help you to move. Try not to over think. Find a positive thing about yourself everyday. I don't care how small it may seem. Read some affirmations everyday till you can start to find light.