Are You Afraid To Be Happy?
Cartoon character Charlie Brown from the old comic strip 'Peanuts' once said "I think I'm afraid to be happy because whenever I get too happy, something bad always happens."
Do you have 'Charlie Brown' syndrome? Have past experiences made you afraid to fall in love or feel happy in case it all just gets taken away from you again or you get hurt? Stop and think for a moment about what you are doing - you are keeping yourself from the very things you crave. How illogical is that - to want to be happy but to deliberately choose to stop yourself from being happy? To fear losing happiness and love so you never allow yourself to have it? Isn't some happiness and love - even if you think it will be fleeting - better than none at all? Are you really protecting yourself by denying yourself a chance to be happy or loved? Or hurting yourself more than any other person or situation ever could?
People who choose to think negatively (and it is a definite choice, perhaps subconsciously, but you can make a conscious decision to feel good just as easily as you do to feel bad) don't realise that it does them absolutely no good at all. Feeling bad over some disappointment just makes you feel worse. So you may as well choose to be positive. You may as well say "OK, that didn't work out. But it doesn't mean that everything else in my life is not going to work out, either. It just means I have to try another way of getting what I want because this experience has shown me my old methods and thinking don't work. Next time I will do better."
The reward of being positive is feeling positive - it is its own reward, not the sort of material payback you may be hoping for. It's that feeling of jumping out of bed energised in the morning, not expecting anything in particular but nonetheless knowing it will be a great day just because of the way you feel. Now it might be an 'ordinary' day in many respects but choosing to face it with hope instead of fear guarantees that you will feel terrific for 24 hours. And happiness has a way of transforming an ordinary day into something quite extraordinary.
All you have to do is believe that it's all good - that nothing bad will ever happen to you. Don't let things that you perceive as bad events in the past sour your present. I know that if you look back on so-called bad things that happened, some good lesson or self-awareness will have come out of it. You grew and matured, so it really was a good thing in hindsight.
In fact, you may be the only bad thing in your life right now. Your own fear of disappointment could be keeping you from opening your heart and experiencing joy and abundance. Simply because you're afraid of being let down. But aren't you the one disappointing yourself by not allowing yourself to experience even a teensy bit of happiness or love?
This is why it's so important to love yourself. If you have positivity deep inside you, it's not dependent on outside events. You can be joyous and in love ALL THE TIME, even without an outside source of these things in your life. There are so many things to feel happy and grateful about in your life that you may be missing them by feeling depressed. Negativity clouds your thinking and blinds you to reality, positivity helps you to see and understand. How beautiful is the natural world around you, full of colour and smells and music!! You have friends, family, a destiny, a career, freedom, health, food on the table and a roof over your head, or just plain being alive to be grateful for.
True deep down happiness and love is something that can't be taken away from you because it doesn't depend on outer circumstances. Be in love with yourself and life. Be happy because of all the small wonderful things and don't depend on large events to make you feel good. When you are filled with an appreciation for the smaller things in your life, that vibe will attract the bigger things by default.
Don't let fear push away the very things you crave. It doesn't make any sense to deprive yourself of the very things that everyone has a right to enjoy.
This is what I have learnt -
1. Happiness is a gift that's waiting to be claimed - everyone can claim it.
2. Only I can make myself happy - it is a choice.
3. The more I focus on all the good stuff - my own good qualities and the abundance that I enjoy - the more I am going to be happy.
4. I don't have to be apologetic about being happy when someone else is miserable. Everyone makes their own journey and I'm not responsible when you're are not happy.
5. Most of all, I realized that God doesn't measure out blessings and happiness based on our 'performance' or meeting certain standards.
Corinne Gyaan, life coach and inspirational writer
"It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day-to-day basis." ~ Margaret Bonnano
And you don't need a horoscope or psychic reading to reassure you that you will be happy in the future - make it happen for yourself. Your life is no accident, you are in charge of it all the way. If you want love and happiness, you have to put in the work to make yourself believe that you deserve them and can achieve them.
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